Can we do war with skeletons without calling it the skeleton war?
October 20, 2014
1:31 am
Nothing in Hyrule warriors is more delightful than releasing a stalchild bumrush on your enemies in Ganon’s first level. Just Ganondorf charging into battle surrounded by a posse of knee high skelly babies.
Discussion (94) ¬
I could be the… bone… war?
“I got a BONE to pick with ya!”.
XDDDDD
ಠ_ಠ
They certainly seem to have gotten themselves into a BONY situation….
That’s not even a pun…
Yep, they’re boned.
You could say… I have the weirdest “boner” right now.
Ha! Nailed it. :p
YOU could say it but I can’t. But I CAN say that the both of them have the weirdest boners right now…
I boned your mother
For a nickel
Cheap.
He couldn’t let them bones walk alone.
He seems to have a few skeletons in his closet.
Everybody sing along now:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HrzBsUtUdts
while we are on the subject of singing:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2ZAVR_np3E
personally I consider that one of the reasons of the transformation from Ganon to G-Man
or they could play, a game of bones?
Crossbone Calamity maybe?
Crossbone Gundam + Calamity Gundam = Crossbone Calamity Gundam!
Dude! You’re a genius!
You’re crossing the streams here.
A bare bones comic. I like it.
I guess Commander doesn’t find these skeletons very…humerous.
I’ll show myself out.
I don’t agree…This comic sure hit my funny bone.
Is that supposed to be a good thing because it hurts really bad when I do that.
Man someone needs to call animal rescue Ganon isn’t feeding his pets, look at them you can see their bones showing and everything.
Can I just say that Business Gannon is the best thing since sliced bread.
I don’t even play the game and I dig him.
I don’t know, sliced bread isn’t that great.
Say that again after you’ve bought an unsliced loaf at the store.
Hmm, fresh unsliced brown bread. My fatal weakness.
I just wish I could get this as a costume for him in the game… Darn consoles and their lack of a modding community :(
man, g-dorfs eyeliner is On Point
It’s gotta be, man. He’s from a desert-dwelling civilization, you need to know how to use kohl to keep from going blind and/or getting diseases from flies in your eyes.
Ahaha, what a sweetheart. :D
I wonder where they’re kept after this? And how they all get moved? Maybe they just crowd around Ganondorf and clatter down the street in an amorphous knee-high skelly-pool? Ohhh… I’m not familiar with stalchilds (stalchildren?) but I hope they all make some kind of excitable chattering noise because that makes my imagined scenario cuter…!
They sound kind of like someone shaking a rainstick when they run.
I happened to have a rain stick on hand so I shook it gently for reference, haha! I see now – a nice noise in small amounts, but probably very hard to hear over when you’re herding them through hallways and city streets. But at least it sounds a little like a party wherever you go, and also maybe keeps unsavory peeps at bay.
Wish granted.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nEJdby6zNy0
Even cuter then that! They remind me of a bamboo wind chime. I love the sound they make. <3
That is really cute!! But oh my gosh, transporting them anywhere would cause a real cacophony. With this many of them it would be like knocking over a maraca factory. Oy!
None the less, if they were a thing, I would buy one. …or two. …or, well, what’s the smallest number for a “horde”? ;)
Let’s just say that a horde is so many that you can’t count them because they can pretty much FILL your field of vision & you’ll be too busy running & screaming…
In the game they are indeed referred to as stalchildren in the plural.
So when it come to the animated skeletons I have always wondered one thing. Did they start out as zombies? Were they zombies that kept shuffling around till all of there flesh rotted away?
There’s unfortunately a lot of discrimination in skeleton society between those who were raised 100% bones and those who still had flesh when their undeath started. They may have stopped being alive but they sure haven’t stopped being plain old human.
Well, except for these guys, they seem to be more canine than human if the skulls are any indication.
Do you think they were living werewolves at one point?
They remind me a lot of wolfos.
http://zelda.wikia.com/wiki/Wolfos
The Stalfos are supposed to be humans who got lost in the woods and ended up cursed. I always assumed that stalchildren were the same, but with human children or kokiri.
Stalfos skulls don’t quite match up with humans either, so I figured that the warping was just part of the curse.
What out for toes snatchers, everyone !
Their favorite bone is in your leg. You’ve been warned.
Commander, they will rot into ashes.
No, they can be *burned* into ashes…But will *rot* into dust.
Baldur’s Gate: Dark Alliance calls it “Battle of the Bones”.
Hehe. I really love your take on Ganon each time you put him in. It just makes me smile. :)
Yes, more Ganondorf. MORE GANONDORF
I like how Ganondorf is portrayed as an inherently decent and likable human being in MGDMT. It’s so flippin’ cute.
Compared to Link’s Rampant Racism and d baggieness?
Sure you can have a war with skeletons and not call it a skeleton war.
Just call it the Stalfoss War!
Or perhaps the Stalchild War.
Say, Ganon is at the center a lot, is dressed more formally than most of the folks, and is pretty calm; is he a client or does he work there?
Good guy Ganon strikes again.
I think Ganandorf is a client who’s really far in his treatment, so he might help other patients adjust to non macho life, but he also talks with Commander when things are bothering him, and he’s still not 100% ready, but he’s close.
Now all this scene needs is Link whacking his way through those skeletons. XD
Now that I think of it… What exactly is it that Ganon does in that agency?
Financial. He’s the financial department. The entire department.
He manages every dollar and rupee, and even sticks some in hard-to-reach places that Link wouldn’t think of to entertain Jared.
Coelasquid makes the best version of a lot of characters, and Ganondorf is no exception.
In today’s episode, the voice of Commander Badass will be provided by H. Jon Benjamin.
I’m serious. Reread the strip, but picture it in Archer’s voice. It works really well for this one.
I’ve always wondered what Stalchildren (Stalchilds?) are the skeletons of and why there’s so many of them in Hyrule Field. I could assume they’re human but the skulls are so strangely shaped…
Lore wise? Kokiri who got lost in the in the Lost Woods (so no, not human). Kokiri are unaging and (presumably) immortal as long as they remain in the forest; they are kept alive by the Great Deku tree (or his descendent, the deku tree sprout). Getting lost in the lost woods, they are separated from their normal food sources but are still immortal, so they waste away until they are just a desire to survive and a skeleton, their brain and flesh rotted away. As hyrule has steadily been claiming more territory from the forest, the Kokiri village and location itself has been steadily decreasing in size, removing their once-expansive society. However, the lost woods are, by magical design, nearly infinite if not actually infinite. So as room to live disappeared in the standard Kokiri woods, to survive, the Kokiri moved into the lost woods. Hypothetically, there could be some Kokiri villages deep in the lost woods, however those who left said village would always be at risk of not being able to find their way back. However… infinite forest, potentially infinite villages, constant need to expand, and getting lost in the wrong way in the woods kicks you OUT of the lost woods (and even if the lost woods are infinite, its borders are not).
So, you have an endless supply of Kokiri emerging from various points outside of the lost woods, emancipated and kept alive only by the magic of the Deku Tree (a near endless supply). They can go back to eternal wandering, or G-dorf can use his magic to replace that of the Tree and give them a home again.
So, actually, this comic is amazingly in-character for G.
Non-lore wise…
Snoopies. Clones of Snoopy that have been killed and reanimated through dark magic.
They’re the bones of ugly children who had been thrown out because no one wanted to look at their grotesque faces.
As Ganon indicated where he got them from, I don’t think those are *human* bones…He said he got them from the pound. They’re most likely cats or dogs (or some combination/ratio thereof).
It’s entirely possible that some bigot put them in there for being nonhuman and/or undead. This IS a ‘verse where Dragon Age characters, and worse, exist.
(Speaking of which, Inquisition looks like a blast; anyone taken it for a spin yet?)
All those skeletons theme song:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q6-ZGAGcJrk
“Well, we’re boned!”
/Bender
Since nobody else said it…
thank mr skeltal
nice comics)and moar Ganondorf.More of him is always good.Now if you only did fishing rod joke…
Ganondorf seems to be the undead equivalent of a crazy cat lady.
Which is, admittedly, still an improvement for him.
Glad I’m not the only one that thought about the Skeleton War when I first saw a horde of Stalchildren in Hyrule Warriors.
These comments have some real bonefide bad puns…
The only thing missing now is a cameo appearance by Napolean Bone-aparte…
hehe, amusing :)
Every comic you do involving Ganondorf brings me such immense joy. Please don’t stop using him.
Hnngh! I agree. I’m actually becoming fond of Ganondorf as a character, and it’s kinda weirding me out a little. This page makes him positively endearing. D;
Just wanna say your commander mii you shared a while back is awesome, I made him into a brawler and gave him a biker outfit. He looks just like the real commander now.
You could say with this tactic,
Ganon STALS them for time.
Hohohoho!
I can’t get over Ganondorf’s elaborate hairdo. It strikes that 50s string for all thre wrong reasons. ^^
You just keep portraying Ganon’s hair bigger and bigger, don’t you, Turnbull?
Have you SEEN Hyrule Warriors Ganondorf?!
I just read all posted comics the past three hours and I think I found my new favorite webcomic of all time. This is so awesome holy crap
Behold! The true victims of the Stalfos War. Stop the war, bring the parents home to their stalchildren, where they belong.
On Monday, I wondered why Ganondorf was surrounded by a horde of Dry Bones.
On Wednesday, I unlocked him in Hyrule Warriors: Comic fully understood. There’s nothing like playing as the villain when he’s properly powerful and usable (Brawl, I speak of thy Ganondorf, whose speed and attack speed are issues most severe)… and conquering a diabolical objective of having two respawning enemies defeated before the other one respawns only cements his power.
I must say I absolutely LOVE how you draw Ganondorf. He looks so RIGHT in a suit. I wonder what link would look like in a suit?
‘Stick Around!’
Not sure if this has been asked already- were those there as animals, or for the animals?
I mean…they are bones in a dog pound…..
So, wait, does Ganon work at Commander’s Testosterone Rehab? Or is he a former client, and now he just hangs out sometimes? Does Commander’s place have other employees besides the Commander and Jared? If so, who?
Bonetrousle intensified