Continued Goatmancer adventures
December 22, 2014
2:28 am
I was racking my brain trying to think of something Christmassy but this has been a very not Christmassy year for me because southern California is the least Christmassy place on Earth and I don’t even have a Starbucks in Walking distance to remind me of what month it is with seasonal window decals anymore, so I finally gave up around 9:30 and drew this in two hours. (the sheep will look way more enchanted when I colour it I promise.)
But for real Vivienne is gonna save your marriage if you need to take Bull out to kill a dragon to fiish off his romance.
If you can’t beat a dragon by chucking goats at it then beat it by chucking enchanted goats at it. Logic at its best.
One of those sheep is clearly on fire or something. This actually might work.
And one of it is on… Lightning?
thunder…Thunder…THUNDER GOATS, HOOOO!
Well, I mean, Thor the god of thunder’s chariot IS pulled by flying goats sooo….
Point taken ^_^
Thunder… thunder… THUNDERGOATS! BAAAAA!
This comic makes a lot more sense now that it’s in colour.
It look like the goat is going super saiyan without color. And while I know that is the intention; it is just all the more amusing to me.
This is a totally canon reaction for Dagna. Now I wanna fling firegoats and launch lightingrams…
Vivienne is just Maleficient wit a negative visual filter lol, its ridiculous
I think you mean lightningrams?
I think the best way to kill the dragon would be to poison the sheep, and then trick the dragon in to eating them. Not sure what would be poisonous to a dragon, or how large of a dose it would need. Clearly the details need some work, but the basic framework is solid.
OBVIOUSLY the only possible plan of action is to paint the goats in full-body Vitaar. Not sure if the goat will survive, but it’ll look really cool
Well, assuming dragons breathe fire, I’d go with tar. It worked in Bel and the dragon anyway…(that’s a biblical reference…^_^;)
There is an old Polish legend that uses a sheep
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wawel_Dragon#History
As a basically grimdark setting, Dragon Age is closer to The Witcher than to normal lightish fantasy. And the feed-a-poisoned-bleating-thing-to-a-dragon plan went very, very wrong in The Witcher…
Well, I’ve been picturing your Stan the Inquisitor as basically being Dragon Age!Krampus this whole time, so seeing Krampus!Stan continuing to try and go after a dragon with sheep shenanigans is plenty festive for me.
God I loved Dagna in origins, she was the person I was most excited to see return. My only sadness is we never got a scene of her and Solas talking and being giant magic nerds together.
I was so excited to see her in DA:I. My reactions were, literally: “Dagna?!? the little dwarf girl who wanted to study magic!?!? She did?!?! And now she’s here?!?!! AWESOME!!!!”
Not only is she *there*. She’s second only to Sandal in terms of how good she is at “ENCHANTMENT!”
Also, she can do some “Not Enchantment.” Then again… Sandal’s “Not Enchantment” results in Ogres being frozen solid.
You obviously haven’t been to Australia around Christmas time. Extremely non-Christmassy (for an American anyway)
The black and white versions of these DA:I comics of yours seem to belong to an issue of “Conan the Barbarian” Specially the first panel in this one. Hope you consider including him some time you’re feeling retro or something. Best wishes for the holidays to you Coelasquid and fellow manly guys fans
I heard great things about Viv, but I personally just used her for barriers and healing. I liked my inquisitor a lot more. She was a Tal-Vashoth 2H Warrior specialised as Champion. Combined with the masterwork material that heals for 25% of damage taken (including damage you take to barriers/guard) she was practically unkillable. That is how I killed 9 of the 10 High Dragons.
The final High Dragon, which was also the toughest of them all, died a slightly different way. I started out the same way I killed the other dragons, but at 90% hp I sicced Sera at it. Three seconds later, the Dragon was dead. I kid you not. In fact, I got it on tape: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQHb11OSQlE
So say what you want about Viv, but Sera is the girl for me.
I played as a dagger rogue and the amount of area damage/cleaving makes it pretty tough in many of the later fights. What I found worked really well was masterwork +guard on hit. With the amount of attacks you make as a rogue, nothing gets through your guard at all.
Mark of Death from the assassination tree is ridiculous. Doubles ALL damage taken for 10 seconds.
fun fact, blackwall carves a rocking griffin by the end of the game, i though that was a cool detail after doing his story stuff.
Mage Inquisitor for the win, although Knight Enchanter is easy to make the game a cake walk, slap some points into Spirit Tree for Barrier buffing, slap on 1 +3/+5 Guard on hit masterworks either to weapon or armour [no stacking effect] make sure you have the base KE spell skill, leave your friends behind, go kill the hardest dragon you can find [killed one dragon 4 levels above me with ease].
I totally hear you. My only difference is that I was a mage who was totally shacking up with The Iron Bull, so I made sure to keep him alive at all times while I solo-ed the dragon and he gleefully ran around “helping”. Dragon slaying time was basically our date night.
I killed one 9 levels above me…on hard…I decided not to make another knight enchanter mage after that.
My second playthrough is a qunari mage specced Knight Enchanter, its silly how quickly stuff gets meted.
That’s okay, Ceola.
This is Christmas enough for me.
And the full color version will be even more Christmas OvO
In all honesty, this would make a great animated short.
cool sheepy rocking horses, can’t beat that! merry enchanted christmas all!
Does Goatmancer have a name? Can we give him a name? Can he be Ramsley? YES RAMSLEY PLEASE
His name is technically “Chief Movran the Under”, but ramsley is definitely better.
Technically his name is Movran, sorry. =(
CRAP TACO
He can still be Ramsley
Varric never lets little things like real names stop a really good nickname… (On a side note: Blackwall was totally making a rocking griffon.)
My next Pathfinder character is going to be a Goatmancer. Not even sure how that will work, but different classes have animal companions or can summon critters (celestial goat? Why not?) so it will happen.
I am actually in the process of convincing my GM that Summon Nature’s Ally III should allow for dire goats.
Livin’ the dream, brother/sister/etc.
Ensorcelled goats? That’s the best new unorthodox ammo type since I was flinging diseased corpses at people in Warcraft III.
Still think the Goat Simulator people need to have a look here. THERE ARE IDEAS WHICH ARE MADE OF GOLD AND FIRE AND LIGHTNING FOR THE TAKING.
Granted, diseased corpses were actually used in our world’s history. Nothing breaks a siege like the plague.
Warning: Do not break Sieges with Goats unless you want to have to burn EVERYTHING inside the besieged castle to purge the disease you’ve spread inside.
now the real question is does their wool stay enchanted when crafted into sweaters? if so could we see stuffy Magic sweaters in the future? Please?
Shut up and take my money $$$$$$$
What purple said.
Oh god I can just imagine it. Commander:”Hey Jared. I wanna thank ya fer the sweater, but I gotta ask where did you get it?” Jared:”Oh I just got that from one of Sten’s Qunari buddies. Why you ask?” Commander: “Cause this sweater is kinda chilly.” Cuts to shot of an ice enchanted sweater that Commander is wearing. Cuts to Sten: “Pashara! What have you and the Tal-Vashoth done Hissrad?”
Then Vivienne learns that Dagna somehow enchanted those sheep to have Ermenegildo Zegna Perpetual Trophy grade wool and she is all on board.
Yes…come to the dark side, Vivienne, we have high-quality fabric!
I love how in-character everyone is. Seriously.
If you wanted the conclusion to be Christmassy, the enchanted goats could always be made into enchanted ugly Christmas sweaters. Come to think of it, Iron Bull in an ugly Christmas sweater would be a lovely present. :D
I can’t quite tell without the color but, is Blackwall holding up Stan AND Iron Bull? Legit.
What I gather from these comics is that party members with horns are THE BEST, and I totally forgot about Vivienne. NOW THE CIRCLE IS COMPLETE!
Goats live in stables, we can call it Christmasy, there’s goats in nativity scenes right? Of course right. Boom merry Christmas everyone, and happy assorted December holidays as well!
Enchanted goats?! That’s exactly what I wanted for Christmas! How’d you know?!
I haven’t even played Dragon Age, but these comics are wonderful. <3
Zach Weiner has a comic this week about throwing goats too!
SMBC
Not related to DAO though.
In my opinion, throwing rune amd enchantment encrusted goats at a dragon is the single most Christmassy thing you can do. Christmas is about spending time with loved ones and spreading joy through giving. I can’t think of a better way to spend time with loved ones than by fighting a dragon with them, and can any one of you think of a better way to spread joy than by giving the gift of enchantments to an entire herd of goats?
I’m loving Qunari Squad’s adventures.
electric sheep!!!!!!!! now… is Movran a pokemon trainer… or an android?
This has been, by far, one of my all time favorite story lines. It’s just… SO awesome! I just… Awesome!!
It seems to me that Dagna has essentially created the DA version of Pokémon. I am 100% okay with this. Also, Vivienne and her horns fit in perfectly with you team of horned destroyers. <3
Enchanted goats…
Now I’ve seen everything
I can’t help but think of “The surviving dragons still have nightmares of electric sheep…” should be an official epilogue line in Inquisition now.
Ahahah.
I saw the B/W version of this, and it was excellent.
But the color version of this is even better. That’s really, REALLY funny!
holy shit, those colours!
that is some hardcore muttonmancy right there!
Now I wish I did more research on Arcane Warrior instead of just diving into Rift Mage. You can buy pendants to rebuild your characters whenever you want at the smith shop. they’re like 300 gold, first one free.
I just love that last panel, all their faces are so confused “What do you mean It’s a bad idea to throw enchanted magical sheep at a dragon?”
Someone send this to Bioware.
This kind of shit needs to be in the next game. I want a Mabari that LITERALLY eats lightning and craps thunder.
Yours didn’t? Soaking five Lightning Bolts to the face with no fucks given and horrifying Wynne with farts seems pretty close to me.
Oh my goodness it’s even better in color. Merry Christmas everyone!
I feel like you should try to solve all problems by throwing a goat at them. Computer breaks down? Throw a goat. Partner breaks up with you? Goat. House on fire? GOAT.
Might not want to use a fire-enchanted goat on that last one, though.
Nope, water-enchanted goat!
I have now solved all of life’s problems. Now where’s my goddamn Nobel Prize?!
Burglar in your house? you better believe there’s a goat for that.
This particular comic made me give DA:I another shot and I’m very glad I did. You are a good person and people say good things about you. I assume about the second part, I have my own metric for the first after all.
I thought Vivienne was a Qunari for the longest time… then I took off her hat…
And the amount of per capita sass that happens if you put 4 mages in a party is incredible… just saying…
So Final Fantasy XIV is having their New Years event today, the story is pretty simple, the worlds deities all change shifts on whose in charge every year around this time, and a group of people from the “Far East” always shows up to ring in the new year while also educating us heathens on the wonders of said deities totem animals.
Last year was the horse, so we got a story about Horses versus the Final Fantasy classic Chocobo’s.
This year is the Ram, so we’re getting a story about…weaponized rams…which reminded me of this comic. Looks like Chief Goathucker decided to go visit Japan for a bit.
Awesome comic :) Pooor Blackwall, go do some whittling and destress, let Cass tank for those nutcases for a bit. (Because as much as I love Bull and have him as practically-permanent DPS fixture in my party, I’ve found he tanks as well as bull-sized fishbowl. One massive chunk taken out of the enemy’s health bar and then it’s dirt-nap time for the Qunari)
…If Dagna DID enchant goats, you could use them as nuclear deterrents. She’s scary good at what she does.
I hit this site quite accidentally while doing a little web research on DA:I. Having played through the goat scene (which remains one of my favorite), I was delighted to find your DA:I gems. Love the humor. Laughed so hard. :D
The Qunari Adventures continue! Will our heroes be able to slay the dragon, will we be able to finish our adventures without a mage, and can they continue to be complete and utter badasses, find out next week!
Having played DAI I find this the absolute funniest comic I’ve ever read