He could try transition lenses but they’d give it away indoors
May 29, 2017
2:48 am
A Duke Nukem comic or the first time in 100 years
Manly Guys Doing Manly Things
Updated Mondays or whenever I feel like it
A Duke Nukem comic or the first time in 100 years
I like how Duke is so socially oblivious, he thinks that knowing he needs glasses is gonna make people lose respect for him, and not Duke Nukem Forever.
There’s no Duke Nukem Forever.
Duke Nukem 3D is what we’ll all remember him for.
In Duke Nukem 3D, he was a borderline likable jerk. In DNF, I outright hated him because he was just a dull-dumb fuck and almost every joke fell so flat that they crawled back into a sub-dimension, if not collapsed into a singularity of stupid. Made me angry about myself that I expected something good after all that hiatus.
So DN3D is the end of the lore and I like what Coelasquid made of it.
Hey now don’t throw Manhattan Project too hard under the bus. That game was surprisingly damn good.
But agreed on that last part, I love what she’s done with the character.
*Holds turd, questions self*
Yeah, the writing needed some work. The DLC campaign was better.
Pfft, DNF was an average game people blew out of proportion.
12 years of waiting for something “average” will do that.
Hype culture at its best…
…Half-Life 3 is going to have to come with an Elixir of Immortality and Eternal Youth and a lifetime supply of dopamine injectors
“2/5 stars if a game comes with immortality it should at least keep me occupied for a few centuries.”
If Valve even had the vaguest of plans for Half-Life 3 at all, they’d be shelved by now thanks to this.
Their corporate thought process probably goes like this: “looks at NMS utter promotional failure, then looks at HL3’s hype machine… nope nope nope nope deny deny deny…”
…How can you have a lifetime supply of something if you’re already immortal?
So you can make other people immortal?
Honestly being immortal would bored the s*** out of me, and massively depressed if I was the only one.
You need a hobby to keep you angaged. Look up Wowbagger The Infinitely Prolonged for inspiration! :-D
Well it’s perfectly consistent with one of the first comics about the macho agency (06/21/2010): Duke thinks people will see him like a regular Joe for wearing normal glasses and think he’s less macho for it :P
I swear this is one of the few comics that make me laugh every time. Thanks for the work you do to bring a bunch of random people joy.
I love how you manage to get a wide range of emmotions through Commander’s facial expressions, Coelasquid. Lovely as always
I’ve ridden with people like this. I spend half the time telling him to slow down the other half trying to find something to hastily write out my last will and testament.
I used to drive like that, perscription sunglasses are great.
The passengers think otherwise, but it really helps with oncoming traffic with bad light.
Now i usually wear dark yellow tinted glasses so people can see me seeing things, makes them much more comfortable.
For a moment, I thought they were “prescription for coolness”. And Duke, ever heard of contact lenses ? Obviously not.
idk, i doubt a big guy trusts himself not to take an eye out with contacts
Then he could get badass cybernetic eyes though.
If he wanted Cybernetic Eyes, he wouldn’t be wearing glasses in the first place…
or they’d be like Adam Jensen’s, and built into his skull.
If he was wearing contacts, he’d probably still just wear sunglasses over them.
He’s like Johnny Bravo. “I can’t be seen without my glasses!’
Vision’s not augmented I see.
a duke nuken comic ? welp, that took you FOREVER to make
…
i will show myself out
Haha! This is the kinda personality you’d expect Duke to have and I just love it.
Who here wants Savitar from the 3rd season of The Flash appear in this comic? He qualifies as enough of a Badass:
http://arrow.wikia.com/wiki/Savitar
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1ldOxAUEsI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rRKJ-pPtvb8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s79r4tXLRYw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mDPZtO_XUrE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XqQzz_WJdSg
On an unrelated note, I am oddly disturbed by Savitar’s name, though I don’t watch the series. “Savi” means clay in finnish and “-tar” is a way to make name-like words clearly feminine. So for a native finnish speaker Savitar looks loosely translated like “lady of the clay” or “clay-woman” – and even better, that’s pretty common fairy-styled name from stories, so I immediately imagine a pretty fairy or nymph lady whose magical element is clay :)
Thus I keep getting extremely confused for a moment when I read his name and see his picture.
Maybe that can be a joke in the comic
I’ve never even heard of it, and I still want to see it happen now.
He’s named after the Hindu God of motion…
Heh, just imagined tourists in India who only know the name from TV freaking out over a temple dedicated to Savitar.
That is a funny thought :)
Exactly the same in estonian as well given that both languages are brothers/sisters and all.
Now i imagine Duke with one of the laser guns in the game. Trying to Lasik himself. Yikes.
I love how Duke is consistently the most fragile of them all.
Agreed 100%. I didn’t realize how much I missed the “Duke Nukem is the most insecure of all the machos” jokes until I saw this comeback.
It’s pretty much perfect, and lines up with his character remarkably well. Out of all of them, he’s a badass pretty much only because that’s all he knows how to do.
Activate the night vision Duke!
Your Duke Nukem is my favorite Duke Nukem
Oh my God.
The Commander lost his temper.
There are somethings even space future medicine can’t fix.
As I recall… Space Future Medicine CAN fix that. That’s what he’s afraid of. The loophole in the ‘non-elective’ surgery clause is if he gets roughed up ‘enough'(presumably such that he can’t refuse OR give consent), they get to turn him into a cyborg… and they already stuffed him full of internal plate armor once.
Have to wonder if he’s even aware that he’s not the only one with his hands on the wheel now.
*Minor typo in author’s note of ‘or’>’for’
Dude, get googles.
Sounds like a job for mirrored eyeglasses. If Duke Nukem Forever hadn’t been such a development train wreak and functionally killed the franchise, I’d totally like to see Duke with some Mirrored Shades using newer reflect simulation.
“franchise”
Duke should have turned on Corey Haim, just to emphasize the point.
Duke drives with sunglasses at night.
Duke drives with sunglasses at night.
So he can, so he can hide lack of vision in his eyes.
Don’t get in the car with that guy in shades, oh no!
Driving around at midnight in shades, oh no!
You’ll get killed fast by the guy in shades, oh no!
Duke Nukem drives in the dark wearin shades, oh no!
Hart, even.
Duke just wants to pretend that his future’s still bright.
Contacts, Man! Contacts!
He may be afraid of sticking something on his eye.
I want to see Jared playing magikarp jump, Lobster being pissed do to robot unicorn scores again(magikarp) and the skullings having a cameo!
C’mon Duke! Gordan Freeman wears glasses, and the only reason they pick on him is because he’s never on time.
Hey, it’s not Gordon’s fault he’s always late. He’s being messed with by The Man.
But Gordon is a nerd so it works for him. He can be quite sexy even wearing glasses and not much more https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aqRUjjuUl7U
*expected Gorgeous Freeman* YOU DID WELL!
Duke, wearing glasses doesn’t make you less of a badass. In some scenarios it can actually make someone more badass. Case in point, Father Alexander Anderson. He’d look less than half as badass as he is without those glasses.
…
Also, does anyone want old Marcus from Gerald of War 4 to show up eventually and for everyone to be all “What the hell happened to you?”
Alucard wore glasses too, Integra as well, Heinkell too. If anything all the true badasses wore glasses!
Let’s not forget Walter!!
He only had half glasses! Like his half-loyalty to Integra, the damn traitor!
WHAT?!
You didn’t finish Hellsing yet?
To be fair he didn’t really get much choice in the matter… nazi brainwashing and vapirification and all.
Glasses in Hellsing don’t count, for some reason they’re almost always fully refracting light even when it makes no sense, achieving a similar effect to sunglasses but with glowing instead of darkness!
Are you seeing this?
https://images.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=http%3A%2F%2Fimages4.wikia.nocookie.net%2F__cb20110905181536%2Fhellsing%2Fimages%2F0%2F0d%2FSection_XIII_Iscariot.jpg&f=1
It’s always great to see Commander and the jokes you bring. Thanks for the laughs I get to experience whenever you post MGDMT.
Always bet on Duke.
…To get you killed on the commute.
Y’know, Commander, Serious Sam was also offering. Ya’ coulda rode with him.
Since you mention it, have we ever actually had a Serious Sam comic?
Especially since the last Serious Game was basically what you would want DNF to have been. Plus, Sam totally roxx in his red converse trainers.
Serious Sam has not shown up in this comic once. I’m not sure if Coelasquid even knows about those games.
Or at least get some cyborg eyes like J.C. Denton had…
Well, Duke DOES skate VERY closely to the nerd side of things (Constant pop-culture references, life-size Xenomorph statue at his place, large amounts of special edition movies) and I don’t think that we’ve seen anyone else at the agency wearing glasses that were not either sunglasses or vision-augmenting lenses, so Duke might have a case for not letting the guys know he needs glasses.
Perhaps it was too much looking at explosions and raygun bolts when he was taking down Dr Proton/ The First Alien Bastards who kidnapped him.
LOL, nice one. :)
Quick, somebody finance him opthalmic surgery, let us see if he can just lay there and get his eyes poked at.
Oh, I wear sunglasses outside regardless of time of day/night. Eyes sensitive to dust’n stuff, and I sure ain’t gonna wear no normal glasses…
But, in my defense, I’m not driving a car in the darkness.
Oh come on! You’ve been around that guy long enough to know he doesn’t make the best life decisions.
I’m here to run from my insecurities and chew bubble gum… and I’m all out of bubble gum.
Commander should get JC Denton to carpool him instead.
His vision is augmented.
My glasses broke a while ago, and so I’ve been wearing my prescription sunglasses for like a month or two. Your eyes mostly adjust after a day. Maybe they are the wrong prescription for him.
HAHAHAHAAH keep it cool, Duke!! Awesomeness keeps you save. Also, how are you doing, Coelasquid?
Yesssss. Awkward beefy guys being jerks to each other. This is why we are here.
Whenever it’s the end of my shift at work, my jacket is on and customers cant tell I work there… I see a customer going up to a coworker asking where something is… and they of course are wearing sunglasses an hour before closing at 10pm.. I pass by them saying “Cocaine is a hell of a drug… Clear eyes is in isle 24.”
*raises hand*
Where were they carpooling to (or from) at two in the morning?
Actually, maybe not.
I had a pair of transitions. This was over a decade ago, so maybe they’ve improved since then, but the stupid things took FOREVER to go back to normal when I went back inside, especially if it was a particularly bright day.
I’ve had Transitions nearly that long and they’re fine in summer. In winter, when cold, they take a long time to go clear again.
Couldn’t the Commander let Duke borrow those night vision goggles he’s always wearing on his forehead? Just stick ’em under the sunglasses.
It occured to me today, 11 days after this comic came out, how chill Duke is with Commander to try being cool saying his sunglasses are prescription, but then be insecure about other people knowing he needs glasses.