I might replace this later…
July 11, 2011
12:00 am
Spent all weekend living it up in Connecticon, did more than an entire sketchbook’s worth of free drawings for people so I didn’t have any time for drawing this week’s comic. Still wanted something for the site on Monday, so here’s a phone-photo of a page of the sketchbook I donated to the charity auction.
In case you can’t read my writing it’s;
“Who even buys this weird Sky Mall crap?”
“Pit! Pit! Pit!”
“The time of marshmallow combat is upon us.”
Inspired by the true story of my brother buying me a Sky Mall marshmallow gun….
How was Connecticon? Although I live relatively close to the area I was unable to fuel in the chaos.
I see a makeshift marshzooka in the works…
They already made one, its called marshmallow blaster
We come in peace, SHOOT TO KILL.
Shoot to kill, shoot to kill, we come in peace, shoot to kill men?
It’s life, Jim, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it, It’s life jim, but not as we know it, Captain?
It’s worse than that, he’s DEAD, Jim! Dead, Jim! DEAD! Jim! It’s worse than that he’s DEAD, Jim! Dead, Jim, DEAD!
Theeeeeere’s Klingons on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow,
There’s Klingons on the starboard bow, scrape ’em off, Jim!
((Actually, this raises a question: wouldn’t all sides of a ship be the star-board bow in space?))
I thought she sings “Starbase down”, makes more sense^^
Ye canna change the laws of physics!
(Spacecraft will have nautical terms applied, so starboard will always mean “right” )
YES.
Reminds me of the time I built that potato gun one awkward night at collage…
“collage” – you were piecing together images to create a multi-part scene?
You must have made your collage tatergun at college
Inb4 Jared gets whacked with a Weapon of Marshmallow Destruction.
Or the Marshzooka as posited above.
Oh Jared, you forget you’re running around with manly men. Manly men shoot guns that shoot other guns that shoot STEEL MARSHMALLOWS.
Seriously tho, true story about Skymall. Every time I fly, I can’t help but flip through the whole catalog, then shake my head at all the inane things they’re selling (not to mention the pricing). Laser hair growth therapy, only 99.99!
Oy *facepalm*
Jareds gonna get a marshmallow magnum upside the back of the face
I must see a marshmallow war now.
MUST.
“The only way to win is to not play.”
XKCD!
I know XKCD when I see it!
Actually, that line is originally from the movie WarGames [/pedant]
I think the line is “The only winning move is not to play.”
And it’s WarGames, an old 1980’s movie about an AI almost starting WWIII because some kid breaks into the SAC mainframe in Cheyenne Mountain and wants to play Global Thermal Nuclear War.
Although, XKCD is a great comic that has touched on WarGames references like nine times since it started. LOL
…Yep, that sounds like something Randall would reference.
That kid was the incomparable Mr. Matthew Broderick (Ferris Bueller. Anyone? Anyone?) and his lovely co-star Ms. Ally Sheedy (of Breakfast club and St. Elmo’s fire fame). <3 the 80's
Ah, but the only way to win a MARSHMALLOW WAR is to bring chocolate bars and graham crackers.
If you eat their ammo, they have nothing to shoot!
The above by McClaud is the best post EVER! (this week)
But then they can smack you upside the head with their weapons while you’re to bloated to move…
Not necessarily. Marshmellows are not one of those foods that slows you down.
You forgot fire, bar.
Those marshmallow guns are pretty great.
Well, I don’t know how much they cost. One of my dad’s coworkers used to make his own and sold them for 6 bucks so everyone in the house had one.
Jeez, ever since Jared became a real man, he’s really grown some balls, taking on the Commander like that. Good on him, just hope he doesn’t get too big for his britches too quickly. He’s still the scrawniest man in a land of hamfists.
Please don’t replace this. It’s amazing.
That’s awesome!
Do post more doodles if you have some, this one made me giggle :D
*booming Marshmellow Kombat voice* Finish him!
MELLOOOO KOMBAT
MARSHMALITY!!!!!
You can get those things at Thinkgeek and save five bucks, and they also sell the blaster too.
Too funny…I bought my dad and two of my little brothers marshmallow guns for Christmas about 2 years ago. My stepmom was PISSED. That made it even better.
My marshmallow gun has a special place on my mantle next to my mustache monocle. I take stupid purchases very seriously.
lol i thought someone was spitting teeth on him XD
Oh mans.
My sister once had an addiction to Skymall stuff. We had to do an intervention once when she bought the stupid wooden globe that turns into a drink caddy thing for $2500. I mean, it looks cool but holy crud that’s expensive.
Hey now — Sky Mall is full of wonderfully useful things! I had no idea that any of them existed but now I must have all of them. <–sarcasm sarcasm
No seriously, you have a marshmallow gun? From Sky Mall? Sky Mall sells marshmallow guns? Is that next to the pillow that will allow you to sleep on a tray table but which will never fit in a carry-on, ever, or the Wristwatch of Ridiculous Pricing? Or the magic wand universal remote?
If anything, just do a cleaned up version, but this must stay! Please! We need Jared being insane enough to shoot Commander with *anything*.
Are marshmallow guns a thing now? Because one popped up in Girl Genius too.
I just hope there are cocoa cannons as well.
IT!
IS!
ON!
Even with the sub-par art this week, your writing still makes it better than at least 90% what else you’d find on line.
I would “like” this comment if I didn’t hate Facebook.
You can +1 it. Unless you hate Google+ too.
I would +1 it, but I’m all out of +1’s because Google+ just exploded.
I’ve always been amazed by the $1000+ home arcade machine.
I would make an exception for the home arcade machine. It’s what, 30+ classic arcade games on an actual standing console? Pretty awesome in my book, even if it’s way overpriced.
You could probably build one for a lot less than that. Chuck in an old computer running MAME. Hell, you can probably score an old arcade cabinet for less than a grand.
thanks for hangin out at the con eh
i was guna go to con but my friend who promised to buy my ticket as long as i threw in 30 for the hotel back stabbed me and told me to jump off a cliff with two boulders tied to my legs…….i hate people….
Marshmallow guns are awesome.
And delicious.
Hahahaha, awesome. Thankfully, that marshmallow gun is also light enough to not impede your running-away, Jared. :D
I totally saw you at the con, by the way. And I got a free sketch of Mario & Luigi! :D Yay!
awesome, wonder if i can get one XD would be hilarious to say Jared’s line in medical school XD
Your comic is one of the nicest things in the whole internets!
I feel like I can’t love it enough xD
As for this comic, I simply cannot not love Jared being… well, Jared.
“Who even buys this weird Sky Mall crap?”
Speaking as a phone-monkey taking orders for SkyMall, a disturbingly large amount of people, actually.
Haha, I saw this at Connecticon. Should have bet on the sketchbook JUST FOR THIS ONE COMIC, but alas I could not attend on Sunday due to lack of interest.
(For the record, I’m the dude who asked for the Wesker drawing on one of the days, if you can recall it.)
:D That last panel is quite awesome, kudos to you!
I love Jared’s Face in this, he really is trying to live up to his “adulthood” by attacking Commander Badass.
Either live up to, or end it. I mean, the repercussions are going to be pretty harsh.
Still Commander pretty much owns him in every way, just its kinda adorable :3
I think he’s fine as long as he
1 acceps defeat when dealt
2 does not say epic
and 3 runs from canadian guys moose gun cause moose (mooses?) are the same as marshmellows obviously
MAN, NOVELTY GUNS ARE A THING OF BEAUTY. This reminds me of when my English teacher in high school got fed up with kids dozing off in her class, so she bought a toy gun that shot toy pigs. It was the most amazing thing I’d ever seen.
I should probably add that she shot at the students who fell asleep, and not that she bought it arbitarily****
Okay, maybe I’m imagining things, but does Jared look very…um…..’excited’ by his weapon, or is that the tail of his coat?
Jared’s gonna get thrown through a wall…
…but still, this is an important step towards manhood, right?
FFFF, I forgot to come see you at CTCon. How did I even manage that.
It’s no fair! That thing shot five marshmallows at once…I didn’t stand a chance :(
Ahahaha oh my god skymall
I made a marshmallow gun out of PVC pipe when I was a Girl Scout some years ago. I still have it someplace. I should make my mom and my sister each one, Mom has some old marshmallows from God knows how long ago. And then THE TIME OF MARSHMALLOW COMBAT SHALL BE UPON US.
just as long as jareds smart enough not to shoot that thing at some of the other dudes around there.
Every 4th of July, fam and friends come over and we celebrate with a full-scale marshmallow gun war. Blowguns made of PVC, not the silly store-bought toys.
The trick is to leave the marshmallows out to go stale for about a week prior to the big event, so they get nice and hard and don’t stick to the inside of the blowgun.
Those suckers can raise welts at anything closer than 20 feet.
XD Me and my sister had marshmellow combat! We had our own little custom marshmellow guns! I need to buy a few again >D
People don’t know this but Sky Mall is actually part of a D.O.D. top secret satellite based defense network called SkyNet. When it goes active it will drop kiloton marshmallows on all major cities.
….really…
…Too…. much… Jared Crotch….
I’m going to be quoting this all the time now.
It’s kinda weird seeing something in pencil when you’ve only seen digital before. I guess it’s like I imagine everything just appeared on the internet out of your brain completely done.
I saw you at the con but there was like a whole gaggle of people around your table waiting for draawins so I didn’t get to say hello, but I was glad to see you doing a brisk (free) business and makin’ major PR facetime so that’s cool.
In San Diego, on the 4th of July after fireworks we had a marshmellow fight on the beach
i would just like to express my love for how hilariously angular and skinny Jared is.
Just realized that I have a marshmallow gun in my closet that hasn’t even shot a marshmallow in years & I now have the sudden urge to shoot my roommate with it for leaving her towel on the floor for me to slip on again…
ive seen this art style around for a long time (since Disney’s Hercules at least) but you draw it the best.
Is it me or is the Commander flinching quite a lot from being hit by fluffy puffs of sugar?
Well it does look like he’s getting it right in the ear
Psh, a marshmallow gun? Ha, what kind of no-life…grown man would…
ever…buy…
*Cries*
It’s okay, I have one too.
My brother and I have one of those! LOL. (we use real mini marshmellows)
No, you won’t.