Let’s go for the hat trick
September 3, 2012
12:00 am
Oh no I accidentally spent all weekend cheating on my comic with other comics. Just gettin’ really excited about writing this new script.
Jared was about due for some good luck.
Manly Guys Doing Manly Things
Updated Mondays or whenever I feel like it
Hahahahahahahahahaha i was expecting that. Good for Jared!
I wonder about that “Bolted” word… Is it about Bolt that animated super dog (2008)? Or Usain Bolt?
Both of them are FAST, tho XDDDDDDD
“Bolted” is an old term. I’ve been hearing it for most of my 25 years, always in the same context: took off running (like a “bolt” of lightning).
I like how Commander had this whole fatherly speech planned out. Kinda wish Jared had stayed for the whole thing, so we could see what all he was going to say.
Ah, thanx for the info. For an Indonesian like me, the term of “Bolted” is not familiar to my ears. However, i do get the meaning a “Bolt” of lightning ^_^
The “lightning bolt” and “thunderbolt” are named such to liken them to the flight of an arrow, as the short heavy arrows fired by crossbows are called bolts. I’m pleased my suspicion was confirmed when I looked it up. Apparently the usage “to shoot off like an arrow” goes back about 800 years, and via escaping horses “to suddenly leave” only about 200. This is why everyone is so delighted that the world’s fastest runner is named Bolt. :)
Actually, I believe that is supposed to be Lt. Surge. You know…the electric-type Pokemon gym leader from the Kanto region. Looks like him, and he did use the word “bolt”.
I’m pretty sure that’s Guile from Street Fighter.
I’m pretty sure that Lt Surge was a reference to Guile from Street Fighter.
The commanders expression in the last panel breaks my heart in spite of all the chuckles.
Jared is in for it now
Panel 4 is simply beautiful. Just Jared with anime eyes is to cute for words.
yeah but he still don’t has his savegames back
Ah, but it was his achievements, not saved games, he wanted. After all, it’s not about how far you are, but how much you can show off online. And recovering his account will recover all his achievements. Though now, yes, he will need to re-beat his games. Unless the Commander got him his harddrive too.
No he clearly states: “They still have my Xbox! With my save files! And all of my achievements!!!”
But Achievements Transfer when you transfer your gamertag and frankly it’s fun to start a clean slate with save files
You’re all assuming he had Live. If his parents wouldn’t fork over the dough to pay for internet or Live, then none of his achievements are backed up.
Why would he care about his achievements if he didn’t have Live?
You can still get ‘cheevos without Live. Some people like getting them for the sake of getting them.
Except he distinctly says “How am I supposed to show everyone online that I’m beating games without it?”
~D.
I don’t have cheevos for very long before I eat them…
Oh wait! Cheetos! I eat Cheetos!
Maybe his new mission in working for the Commander is to pay his awful parents to mail him his hard drive?
Nah, he spends it on Austin Powers suits and trashbags full of gummy bears.
Oh my gosh. FEELS. So much.
…and then panel 7 happened and I just lost it laughing.
panel 7 TT_TT
I was happy until that. Stabbed me right in the feels, it did. Now, I am sad.
Eh, makes one ponder just how much epic Jared let out so emptiying the jar would be enough to buy that XD
Chuck Norris swung by the office a few times. Mistakes were made.
That.. Would probably be me, too.
That was … ep*c
THAT KIND OF LANGUAGE IS NOT ALLOWED!!!
He could set up a self-replenishing fund if he pays his Gold subscription with Epic Jar contributions.
I’m scared Jared won’t come back
The hell is guille doing there?
Jareds gonna be outta the comic for a good month.
It would be kinda funny if he went to play Street Fighter since Guile is right there.
^That’ll be hilarious! XD Almost made a “4th wall breaking” joke there!
No solution for Nier then. (unless I missed it)
I would guess he got cured with all the other manly guys.
Just cause his version went on and off rather than being permanent like the others’.
Why was he talking with his eyes closed anyways?
Unless he prepared that speech and was mentally reciting something he’d been practicing for a week.
Eyes closed lecture looks more epic.
Contributing to Jared’s XBox Live fund, I see. *extends jar*
I’d say that’s a legitimate use of epic.
Considering the Commander didn’t speak in lengthy poetic verse, it’s not epic.
^Uh oh, Hannah. You’ve said the ‘E’ word!
Most heartwarming moment in the comic.
Surprised Jared doesn’t already own 5 of those considering his spending habits
Maybe the stores with gummy worms and beanie babies just happen to be in-between the bank and the nearest game store.
That, or I imagine he kept putting it off because he kept telling himself he’d get back his Xbox 360 from his parents, and then buying a new one would have been a waste. Sure, that requires some forethought about not wasting money, but never underestimate the ability of a young person to justify procrastinating. Yes, even procrastinating on doing something they actually want to do.
Personally I think the laser fish alone would have been worth an xbox.
But wither way, I always liked the “just the characters bonding” strips.
Those eyes. Should look really nice once color is done.
Now all he needs is interwebs so he can download his achievements!
I was so expecting a hug after those eyes.
Manly Men Do Not Hug. Fist bumps are acceptable, Hand Shakes as well, but not hugs.
Jared hugged the commander after the commander got him the sack of beanie babies though…
Some of the manliest men I know will hug me for extended periods of time.
If you are a man, you embrace your emotions. Otherwise you end up back with the Nomura Virus.
OHGODNONONONONONONONONOOOOOOOOOO
I thought that you lose all of the achievements when you try to recover your gamertag through Xbox live.
You do not.
Save files don’t transfer “Unless they’re on the cloud” but achievements are saved to your gamertag, not your xbox
Why’d i put quotations instead of parentheses?
I don’t know, but it makes you look very skeptical about cloud storage.
Ehh… I don’t trust it either.
Oh so that’s what cloud is for, ltmq
He must be the last good man, I tells ya. The Commander never forgets!
Jared’s puppy dog eye are always absoulty ridcolous and we love them for it.
Panel 4 is ALL THE FEELINGS
THE WIBBLY EYES
… somehow Jared can do that without it looking bad. maybe it’s the face-dragging hands that do it. IDK, it works for him
were you referencing doctor who with the wibbly lever?
I believe that, while the intentions of the last panel were good, the timing was what halted me from bursting out in hysteria.
The Commander’s the ultimate surrogate dad.
^Seconded, & quoted for truth & the great sake of justice!
Thirded!
Also, he’s lickable. Oh, Daddy! ;)
Looks like Jared went home to be a family man.
No no no no. That’s not why you have a swear (or epic) jar! You’re just encouraging Jared to swear (or use the word epic improperly) more often!
It’s still Jared’s money that’s going into it, not anyone else’s. I don’t think Jared’s aware enough to use it for a savings account, dude.
*begins waiting for the day when the XBOX gets destroyed/taken away while expecting him to play it way too much until then*
I’d always wondered if Jared realised he could just get a new xbox and import his profile.
I was half-expecting it to be some kind of choice between becoming a manly guy or going back to his old habits.
Did they mail in his old one or buy a new one?
is it weird I think the comander is sexy ?
No not in the least.
No, of course not.
He’s ridiculously sexy…I hope my hubs looks like him in a decade or so.
I like to think I already do, thanks. I’ve got the chest hair and everything.
yes please good thank
I thought Jarred wanted to get back to his Xbox 360 because it had all of his save files. Sure now he can make new ones, but what of the old ones he claimed to value so much?
I’m surprised there wasn’t a little cloud of smoke.
I know he does appreciate it really, but Jared had best give the Commander and everyone else a proper thank you when he emerges from his grotto when the Xbox RRoD’s.
But the new black ones don’t get the RRoD…
That’s the newest model. They fixed the root cause of the RRoD, so he’s gonna be down there for a while.
That’s the part people homed in on? Really? Either way, Jared’s probably gonna have that on for forty days and forty nights. He’ll Red Ring is somehow.
I suspect he might end up being bored of the 360 as games don’t compare with actual adventures, such as LASER FISH.
Oh, please. We gamers can rationalize our way into playing video games against all odds. Trust me on this one.
Oh this is so nice. Jared will have vitamin D deficiencies for sure after this. I just hope that he didn’t hook it up to the common room tv. I can just see one of the big guys getting irked with him and Jared being to entranced to notice the anger he is causing.
I hope you are doing better. I am sending you mental beer…. with skittles.
It’ll be Jarred and Duke on the couch, yelling at the TV. You watch.
What’s Jared’s gamertag? I’ll so add him, you have no idea!
This was really sweet. Reading it kinda lifted my day higher. I knew the last panel was coming before I read it, as I’m pretty sure we were meant to. The burger bag just made it even funnier to me somehow.
I’m also kinda glad to know that I’m not the only person who cheats on her comic with other comics. heh heh
I’m secretly hoping he’s not setting it up right now, he’s just taken it to run off and be emotional without Cap’n seeing him…
Cap’n is honestly one of my favorite comic characters right now, just because of little things like this.
…you mean “Commander”?
Says he is his favorite character, incorrect rank/name/title.
LOL to the 100th decibel.
Other comics, Squid, how could you?
How could you work on other comics, and then not link to them, so that I can read them?
For… shame? No, that doesn’t sound right.
Well, it depends on what comic it was.
Would be great if the “Epic” jar turned into an “Awesome” jar.
I once again get to bask in the sexy awesomeness of the Commander’s manly chest and all is right with the world.
I see a disappointed but understanding Commander, and I see Mr. Fish being neglected in the near future, and an intervention by the Commander into Jared’s life. We all know he’s gonna spend WAY too much time on that Xbox…
I as a non-native english speaker i found it alot easier to read what the commander says at the beginning of the comic when the speech bubbles spelled out all the words instead of all th’ an’ t’ ect ect
You are awesome! Now, that it’s colored it’s just perfect. The fifth panel: undescribable! It’s so – I don’t know how to say this in english – moving.
Thanks a lot! If there ever will be a printed copy and you ship it outside the US I definitly will buy it.
Jared came to the Commander because he wanted to feel like something he’s not…a hero. The Commander is there because Jared cannot accept what he had done. It broke him. :P
This is even better than the Beanie Babies!
rofl that was a good one
Is that the nameless soldier from X-Com?
Nah, that’s Guile. The X-COM soldiers all ripped off his hairstyle.
anyone else hear the overly emotional music playing in panel 5? XD
Jared serenades his new X-Box:
How do I~ get through one night without you?
If I had to live without you,
What kind of life would that be?
I really dig the composition on this one. the whole page is nice lookin’
and the last panel is really great. a really good angle.
Triangle hair guy, just hangs around to answer the commander when he is confused lol
“triangle hair guy”?!
Faith in Humanity = Destroyed (by sonic boom)
What?! I’m not on the up and up as far as my Burly manly man vocab goes. I’ve only ever seen him here in this comic
That is Guile from Street Fighter, and your Manly card is hereby revoked.
Not everyone has played Street Fighter, Some of us preffered Mortal Kombat and have only seen the Street Fighter characters in the movie. And really, can you blame anyone for not recognising the chatacters after having seen that movie?
“guile’s theme goes with everything” this is internet 101 guys. you should know who guile is. even my mom knows that much.
Guile’s Theme Goes With Everything just means you know Guile’s theme. XD Those ivdeos generally don’t include Guile.
A tear ran down NotGreenArrow’s cheek. A drop of water from his eye ran down his cheek. he cried manly tears.
Jared’s moistened eyes look like he’s on some kind of crazy alien mushrooms.
Oh CMOOOON! He has a Lazerfish! A REAL Lazerfish! Lazer Mr Fish. Mr Fishy Lazerfish…
Jared is lucky enough as it is. And he appreciate it, I am sure, but he’s a simple guy. He appreciate what has been going with his life and all, he is just… Energetic about games and geekery.
The same applies to everything else I guess. He always puts extra effort into every little thing.
I for one vote Jared for Cool Guy.
It’s good you finally colored this, before it the white made it look light commander had no pupils and that was just creepy.
Oh god, I can still see it even in color.
Jesus christ it was up for literally one night without colour.
And I appreciated that it was up :D
Next comic, we’ll see Jared setting up the X-Box, giving the second controller to Mr. Fish, and realizing that this isn’t going to work out. So he goes and gets some power tools and starts trying to make some kind of giant wooden controller connected to the real one, so Mr. Fish can play using his tongue or something. Because he’s not playing until Mr. Fish can too. Shows how his priorities have changed since his beginning.
Ultratroll, courtesy of Gankt: red ring o death right out of the box.
Though you are obviously in no way obligated, may I suggest an appearance of Brick and (possibly) Roland from Borderlands? 0u0
wouldn’t mind seeing Roland, but Brick was in one of the earlier ones if I remember right. Was worried Kain would get all the loot so he had to join in on a bloodbath.
*le gasp*
…YOU’RE RIGHT.
‘Course, I didn’t play Borderlands back then, which is why I forgot about it. *herp-a-derp*
completely excuseable then. :D
I am so glad I checked back for coloring, it seriously made the 4th and 5th panels for me.
Panel 5 just made my day!
Glorious color! It’s always worth coming back for the color version.
But it won’t have all his cheevies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
At first I thought that was Lt. Surge.
http://www.giantbomb.com/lt-surge/94-7557/lt-surge-guiles-long-lost-brother/35-397176/
Ahaha, didn’t Jared technically just pay for his own Xbox? He was probably the one who used the Epic Jar the most often XD
I tried checking the strip at work today and it was blocked as it being pornographic material
Probalbly because of the one strip where Commander was Shirtless.
Eww Xbox, but I’m happy for Jared.
I like to think this strip came about after the previous story arc intentionally. And that the commander realizes how manly you can be despite lack of pectoral mass, now that he has been through nomura-syndrome. It’s really quite awesome of the author to be able to get such sexy charactering in and still pull a joke out at the end. Much talent. :D
When has the Commander ever said he believes someone has to maintain a specific body type to be manly? His office only helps a specific group but that doesn’t reflect his personal beliefs.
He serves a buisness for the manly men of manlyness, and when Jared was first introduced he specifically said he didn’t have the pectoral mass usually required for their applicants. That’s why Jared is just the office assistant boy.
He never outright said it, but it was kinda blatant… Not to mention the whole nomura plot kinda… Well revolved around that way of thinking?
The Nomura syndrome plotline was about consent and identity – specifically Jared’s quest to get back his awesome beard he spent so long growing. Didn’t necessarily limit itself to the ramifications of bishie-fication, like in the Breath of Fire spoof.
Commander runs an agency that helps ridiculously beefed up – and sometimes violent – guys integrate with society, and which also acts as a support group. Does Jared seem like he might have any particular insights into their problems, or even be able to act as a bouncer and physically subdue them if necessary? He really IS unqualified for the position, but after hearing his story the Commander gave him a chance anyway. That might say something about what the Commander really thinks, and what he thinks may not be the same as the company policy (i.e. minimum pectoral girth requirements).
I want to bury my face in Commander’s chest for a nap. He is just so…manly!
I think Jared has a little more stubble than before.
Commander: And we never saw him again.
Jonsie: So… did he SAY you could keep Mr. Fish, or did-
Commander: IT’S WHAT HE WOULD HAVE WANTED.
Commander’s gonna kick himself if they announce a new Xbox is coming.
Literally, he will go back in time and kick himself. In the face.
Warm fuzzies!
Poor kid. He got the console about a year after Microsoft officially gave up on the thing.
That must have been a lot of money in the Epic Jar. I mean, considering it seems to exist solely to teach Jared not to use such language.
Is it just me or does Jared’s face in the last panel look like the yandere trance meme…?
http://safebooru.org/index.php?page=post&s=view&id=702795
FOURTH PANEL. *facepalms*
NINTENDO 64!!! NINTENDO 64!!!!
I love these moments when CB is trying to ‘dad’ Jared. He does it so well. ^.^