Tying Up Loose Ends
January 18, 2016
2:45 am
All the little miscellany that needed to get wrapped up to get back to business as usual. Bit of a nod to a police officer I met once who gave me a really informative rundown of how helpful therapy dogs are for folks with ptsd, even just down to helping you remember if you’d taken your meds or not, and the progress that had been made recognizing that this kind of thing can be life-changing for guys like cops and veterans who had traditionally just been told to suck it up.
Probably a more serious subject to go into that can be tactfully handled in a gag-a-week webcomic, but certainly worth learning more about.
For a minute I read “wranglin'” as “wrestlin'” and imagined Jared trying to wrassle with Mr. Fish. It was entertaining.
Come to think of it, has Sabin ever stopped by the office? A Gyarados COULD possibly work in place of a train.
MOTHERF***ER SUPLEXED A FISH!
Actually, suplexed a ghost train in one of the Final Fantasy games… it was the winning move and as the screen faded in victory, left me thinking “That, was so COOOOLLL!!!!” :D
Great. Now that is all I can think of. Damn you.
I love that the Commander just openly declared Jared to be both his “little guy,” and acknowledged him as a professional handler of dangerous wildlife in general and aquatic predators in particular. THAT is manliness. “I am genuinely fond of this young man and have no qualms about admitting it, and I genuinely respect and acknowledge the accomplishments and skills of my subordinates, and that I learn from them as much as they learn from me.”
Also: I think the reason Tank doesn’t have a therapy animal yet is that the top brass is still too good at attacking his insecurities. His comrades need to pitch it as something cool and marketable, a cool cyberdoggy with a loveable personality, like Blue Falcon’s Dog Wonder.
Preetty sure the “little guy” is Commander’s son, not Jared.
Yeah, “little guy” is his two year old, Sam, with the plush shark.
But he is giving props to Jared with the Sea Monster line.
If you imagine ¨Little guy¨ Is referring to his own penis, it gets way more entertaining.
That tactic has made many a boring sports talk I have been subjected too much more interesting.
His ‘little guy’ is probably his son, who’s always walking around with a plush shark.
Commander is actually speaking honest 200 proof truth. I mean Jared is now an official Pokemon professor isn’t he? I wonder how his parents would react to that… They’d probably still find something to nitpick about like “You are supposed to Capture Pokemon not give them away! Professors are Trash! Only Gym Leaders and Masters are worthy!”
Kanto, Johto, Sinnoh, etc. all have their Elite Four – highly skilled professional trainers with squads of specialist Pokémon. When someone defeats them all, that person is crowned Champion.
America has Jared & Mr Fish, the Elite One. So far, no Champion.
Probably because Mr. Fish’ modus operandi against enemy Pokemon is to EAT THEM. No coming back for Round 2 there isn’t.
Jared is Nuzlocke.
Jared should get him a therapy beldum, a tyrunt or a clefa
Therapy growlithe. Cute and cuddly like any other therapy dog, but it’s wicked badass because it can set things on fire.
you don’t want something breathing fire on you if you have plastic-coated wires that control your mental chemical balance
true… and a beldum, which is metal and therefore probably magnetic, isn’t much better… maybe a Makuhita, so that they can spar?
I think a therapy Eevee would work. A cuddly little sweety that would (hopefully) evolve into Espeon, who would then just levitate him in the air till he chilled out.
I imagine Megaman was a real dick until he got his robot dog.
I never realized cybernetic super soldiers from a bizarre space future could be so damn adorable. Even Tank is adorable at this point and I never thought that’d be possible when he was first introduced. I love how they’ve all become an extended family and try to support one another despite being separated by literally millennia of space-time.
That’s the beauty of people being people. Squid’s put some real work into fleshing these characters out.
I wonder how many vines will Kratos and Duke have recorded at Commander’s house by the time he gets back
That poor oven door…
They seem like decent guys. There’ll probably be a brand-new oven door.
More likely they broke the oven, then the rest of the kitchen afterwards due to Kratos raging and Duke trying to calm him down. Got the guys together and built a new kitchen full of high-end professional grade equipment.
Which the Commander won’t notice, because it’s happened five times before.
this seems like an appropriate time to give him Rayden’s dog, Blade wolf…
A dog-shaped robot buddy did come to mind.
Doesn’t the Commander know Raiden? Wasn’t he a client of his in one comic? I can’t quite remember!
They drink with Robocop King of the Hill style and Commander tried to help Raiden with a CAPTCHA check.
Yay :D:D:D
Shark is back in the ocean.
Thank you, Coela!
You’re awesome.
And The Commander even let the shark keep the sweater & hat as a nice parting gift to remember him by.
;)
Come to think of it, if the big brass guys got Jet the Raptor Squad AND a T-freaking-Rex, then Tank should definitively get a cyber-dog, or cyber-rhinoceros… wonder if they have access to MechaGodzilla?
So they should give Tank the members of Brute Force?
How about Bandit from We3? Same background as Tank basically…although Bandit might be a little messed up like Tank.
I haven’t actually read We3 as the concept is too sad for me.
Normally sad animal stories are like a waterworks factory for me but We3 made me feel like.. patronized kind of? Like it was trying too hard to push the “sad animal story” buttons and make me feel bad and just ended up coming across like it was talking down to me. I dunno, could be everyone was telling me it was gonna be the saddest thing ever and getting my expectations up too much, but I wasn’t super moved by it when I read it like ten years ago or whatever.
I dunno, just my experience with it. Could have been it was just built up too much for me.
I generally agree. Having a cyborg rabbit that shat grenade pellets was mildly funny, and Frank Quitely’s art was very good, but it’s not really re-readable to the extent that another recent Morrison/Quitely book, All-Star Superman, is.
Huh, you know I didn’t like We3 either but I couldn’t say why before I read this comment, but it makes perfect sense. Like it was trying too hard? Yeah. Interesting concept though, and the art was lovely.
I think Rex from Fallout: New Vegas would fit the bill perfectly: Cybernetically augmented, designed to be a living weapon, messed up in the head… Then you fix him. Perfect.
Yeah, I was thinking Rex, too. Rex is kinda the Tank of dogs.
I really liked We3, but I think it’s precisely because I went into it *without* expectations of it being all moving & emotional & whatnot.
I just saw it on the shelf at a bookstore and I was like: “IS THAT IS THAT IS THAT!?”
And for like five seconds my brain was spinning trying to come up with some alternate, less amazing explanation for what I saw on the cover. Then I pull it off the shelf and give it a closer look and them I’m like: “YES IT IS IT’S A DOG IN POWER ARMOR AAWWEESSOOMMEE!!”
And so, y’know, I read We3 through that lens instead. I found it alternately breathtaking (in terms of sheer spectacle: e.g. “WOAH DOG IS TANK BIG DOG IS BIGGER TANK WOW NOW BIG TANK DOGFIGHT!?”) and hilarious (in homage: e.g. “IS THIS ACTUALLY HOMEWARD BOUND WITH MILITARY CYBORGS YES IT IS!!”).
The trick is to think in all-caps from start to finish. A lot like Pacific Rim, actually.
I’m sure Raiden would be willing talk Blade Wolf into visiting.
Now I’m picturing Tank buried under a mountain of cats (my therapy animal of choice).
Immediately comes to mind…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbn75LITtlc
Yay! Props to Jared for his sea monster handling skills! :D
CYBORG THERAPY DOGS FOR PTSD RIDDEN SUPER SOLDIERS.
I AM *HERE* FOR THIS.
Would you consider Rex from Fallout New Vegas? He’s a cyborg dog, and he also spent time working for a post-apocalyptic Roman Legion before being taken in by an Elvis Presley impersonator who runs the ghetto of a Nuclear Wild West version of Vegas. He even experiences neural issues that cause him to be hyper-aggressive towards men in hats before you’re able to find him a new brain in the Wasteland.
Honestly I can’t think of a better fit.
I would like to see Stanley Ipkiss’ dog, Milo, with Tank. Of course, Milo would be more suited for Tank if he has The Mask…
Without the backstory Tank just seemed like a total sexist jackass and now with a glimpse into it. I kinda feel for him but now I am more curious about it.
Love how the megalodon is still wearing its knits! But something about that last panel feels kind of patronizing. I think it might be that he’s talking about Tank like the guy’s not even there.
I realize, in retrospect, the knits were probably soaking wet and keeping the megalodon wet (yes I know that’s not really how fish work, but shh).
Eh, Tank knows his problems and that he’s not always in the right frame of mind to address them. Commander have him a direct well wishing, then asked his support network to look into something that will help him maintain his stability better, which seems fair to me.
The way Rock’s fingers are digging into Tank’s arms, I concur with the Drunkard Kid. I detect bonding, not patronizing.
Although Commander’s “seriously” may have undertones of “should I do everything here?”
He’s frustrated that someone hasn’t already taken measures like that and that twelve years after an unpleasant breakup he still needs to take care of Tank
Ah, gotcha. Thanks for clearing that up!
I’m tickled that one of the big issues in comments last week was “will the megalodon be okay?” Have faith, True Believers, because Coela delivers!
Huh yeah, a megalodon WOULD be pretty tame and easy to handle after witnessing a skinny nerd taking care of Mr. (Laser) Fish.
I swear to god, As soon as this page is colored, That Megalodon will be my skype contact picture for a long long time.
YAY! the shark lives!
How is Dyno-Mutt (partner of the Blue Falcon) doing these days? Would he be too laid back?
I’d go with one of the cyberdogs from Snow Crash. Visually, Neal Stephenson’s description reminds me of a xenomorph more than just about anything, but I liked his description of the VR program that the dogs had running, which had them living in a suburban idyll in which steaks grew on trees.
That was my first thought too, love the Rat Things! Not sure how good a therapy animal a dog that never stops running faster than the eye can see, or has to be kept in super-cold storage, would make though. Maybe Tank could tap into that VR simulation?
Wait.
i have this.
i can just SEE Tank spending time Playing With Bladewolf!
Rock could ask Raiden if Wolf’d be up for participating in a Therapy project, right?
That’s how I pictured it too. Funny how ‘cyberdog’ makes so many of us jump straight to Blade Wolf.
err, you know, pass on the message and a Response?
I would say something big but friendly. Like maybe a Rottweiler or a Great Pyrenees.
And thus, we see the true moral of this story, one we can all apply to our daily lives: don’t kill sharks.
Unrelated, but a quick Google search after a weird conversation with my sister led me to find out that someone else has the same theory about M. Bison being, or having been, a woman, and lo and behold if it wasn’t Coelasquid herself.
I agree with all your points on the matter, but just wanted to add that Bison’s name in Japan is actually Vega, and the star “Vega” in Japan is called “Orihime” after a legendary princess.
I heard it from another guy, I don’t know enough about Street Fighter Canon to come up with that on my own.
Fair enough.
In any case, I leave you all this night with the mental image of a young Raul Julia in Cammy’s unitard.
…Sorry. Now I’m just wishing that Raul Julia was still around.
It’s a bit complicated. According to the American comics (which I go by since the Japanese ones are either hard to find or too expensive for my budget), M. Bison was originally taught his spirit-related techniques by a rather reclusive clan that he had to convince to teach him. During his teaching, he discovered the darker side of the spirit techniques which he dubbed ‘psycho energy’ and used it to wipe out the clan, save the daughter of the clan leader (Rose) who was right next to him and using her own techniques to try and stop him when he went crazy. It was later revealed that their souls had become intertwined due to this. Now here Cammy comes in. Cammy is actually a modified clone of M. Bison. He created her as and another Doll agent as a prototype in immortality since a part of his powers was apparently the ability to transfer his soul. He also created a batch of male clones, but they’re not the point of what you were bringing up. So in effect, Cammy is technically a female M. Bison and even the original M. Bison was spiritually bound to a woman.
I don’t think that Game Canon had gone into nearly as much depth with his backstory, other than the Psycho Power/Engine having been stolen-from/ripped-off-off Ingrid’s tech/powers, though I personally pretend that Ingrid never existed.
Other than that, all we know is that Rose is Bison/Vega’s good half, whatever that entails, and that Cammy is a clone of him (at least to some degree) that he was planning to body jump into.
So the only thing accurate about the spanish representative is actually wrong?
it might not be a cyborg, but great wolf Sif from dark souls would probably fit. as much as i love bladewolf, he’s to…. talkative for this job
The Waving Knitwear Shark is now my spirit animal.
(Also, please let Tank get floofy cuddles from the Raptor Squad – it’d hit me right in the feels)
It wouldn’t be cybernetic, but Ganondorf could probably direct the Commander to a large dog that has a penchant for Good Samaritaning and has way too much free time.
Man, screw self-conscious therapy. I’ve been riding with PTSD for a few years now, and nothing cheers me up quicker than my girlfriend’s Pomeranian.
Seriously, if spirit animals were a thing, this little shit would be mine.
Kudos on the cutest shark ever.
That is the cutest goddaamn shark I’ve ever seen, and I love him and he’s mine now.
*Snerk* and all I can think of is Dr Who’s K-9..
K-9’s more of an android, cyborg usually implies living tissue somewhere in the mix.
So, the comic is just going to ignore the fact that megalodon doesn’t appear in the fossil record until 49.1 million years after the dinosaurs went extinct?
Considering they’re presently in a survival dome in the distant spacefuture I fail to see how that’s relevant.
The raptors just made it seem like they were going with a different theme.
The raptors weren’t part of the survival dome anyway, Jet brought them because they’re his babies (pets).
Not really all that relevant, lol.
In distant space future they can probably just clone whatever they want out of a jar or something.
DAMN Tank is HUGE! I knew he was a big guy but I didn’t realize how large until now with Rock holding on to Tank’s arms and looking up at him.
He’s like seven and a half feet tall. Angel’s like 6′ even, Rock’s 6’4″. Angel’s the tallest of the girls, Rock’s the second biggest guy after Tank (if not flat out the tallest, the highest height-to-weight).
Where does Spider fit in size-wise? – she looked pretty tall, though I guess extendible limbs makes that pretty variable.
Her human body was like 5’3″, her robot body is around 6′ without the limbs extended at all.
… From 5’3″ Spider to 7’6″ Tank. There’s a bit of a neat symmetry going on there…
(Actually, was it straight from Spider to Tank, or was there someone else in between?)
Y’know, the first thing I thought of when I read “Cyborg dog” was the dog from Full Metal Alchemist. Y’know, the one that belongs to Winry and her grandmother. It totally has an automail leg.
What about Amaterasu from Okami? I bet she’d keep Tank super relaxed.
The best thing? Barring extreme supernatural events, there’s literally nothing this can go wrong. And no, this is not sarcasm or exaggeration. Ammy is really that powerful.
OMG I love that first panel SO MUCH!!!
I can’t wait to see it colored!
For some reason Commander learning Sea Monster wrangling from Jared makes me think of the show Leverage, when the group starts to learn each others expertise.
Hey wohooo megalodon as a therapy thing for rock.did he get this idea from a shark with sweater
… I love this idea, except Tank should keep the megalodon. Maybe Jared would be willing to exchange care and sea monster wrangling tips for getting to hang out with the super soldiers?
Tank definitely needs a therapy dagget.
Service dogs are AMAZING. I’ve known folks with service animals for mental health stuff, and honestly, if I could afford the cost (oh god so expensive) I wouldn’t mind having one myself. It could make some things a LOT easier. A lot of people don’t know they exist (unless, like you mention, they know them from veterans’ stuff) and they’re really important!
Same here… I’ve gotten to the point where I can’t even really leave the house without being afraid and panicked. I qualify for a service dog according to my psychiatrist but unfortunately the costs are too much. I know there’s financial assistance or ‘free’ PTSD service dogs but the ones I were finding were only for military veterans.
Yeah, right now, due to paperwork trouble, I’m having trouble with ANYTHING over rent and utilities, so a dog of any kind is completely out of the question. *sigh* I couldn’t afford a rat or a goldfish right now.
Never thought that I would see a megalodon as “cute” before, but the knitted hat and waving fin certainly did it.
I’m not sure if this has been mentioned yet but on the note of Commander admitting his respect for Jared; Jared, or possibly his parents in a show of graffitied for making a ‘man’ out of their son, should get commander one of the manliest pokemon possible. Though Machamp comes to mind first, I don’t think he fits commander quite right. Maybe more Ursaring or Pangoro.
I absolutely adore this comic , and i have to say as a person who has a therapy dog due to my medical history i can say that it would be perfect for tank to have one, i personally imagine him having a cyborg pup that’s a tiny little fluff ball
For some reason, I see Tank ending up with a Pomeranian or similar YLD, and he works on his issues not because his dog is Cool And Manly but rather because it isn’t, and it needs a Big Friend to protect it.
Alternately, a cat of some kind that constantly rides around on his large shelf-like shoulders. Maybe an ocelot because they have Resting Deathmetal Growl.
So, are we going back to the Temp thing? Not that this hasn’t been fun, but we all know what happened the last time the Commander was away for an extended period of time.
Well that was only because Jonesy thought about time travel. She probably won’t do that again. And if not I have no idea why the Commander brought her in the first place.
My first thought was “Wait, so who won?”
My second thought was “Does it even matter?”
Rocky did, when he brought the Megalodon and flattened the mansion (after knitting the hat and sweater)
“Reset the survival dome.” So, what, is it a simulation or a holo-projection of some sort?
And once again I’ve mistaken Angel for Ace. This one’s totally on me Coela. Christ, she’s even wearing a sports bra. How do I miss that?
That’s why Ace always wears a tuxedo :D
Ace has a square jaw, Angel has a longer face and a pointed jaw, Ace has a straight, sharp nose with small nostrils, Angel has a rounded Lee van Cleef style nasal bridge and flared nostrils, Angel has a deeper set eyelid. All of the super soldiers save Jet (who has a shaved head) and Brunhilde (who has braids) have the same haircut. Angel’s face is structurally more similar to Cate’s than Ace’s, the biggest thing she has in common with Ace now that I have both of their designs nailed down is just skin tone and hair colour (Angel is darker, though).
I just realised that Commanders nose always faces to the left
Yeah Tank (and his space future missions but mostly tank) broke it multiple times. Now it look like that ^.^
It faces whichever direction his face is mostly tilted towards
Oh god the shark is waving. That’s totally adorable.
Yeah Tank (and his space future missions but mostly tank) broke it multiple times. Now it look like that ^.^
wrong post sry ^.^
Did ya know, before dogs got all the therapy pet gigs, they used to use ducklings?
Really? A relative of mine used to have a duck and a goose and i always saw them as goofy, yet very detached.
Did the commander get a tan while in the Survival dome?
I think I accidentally started sampling his skin tone from a scene with different lighting a few comics back so he’s a little darker than usual, but I figure it’s easy enough to say he got a tan running around topless for however long. I mean, he’s supposed to be sort of ethnically difficult to place á la Vin Diesel or Dwayne Johnson anyway, so it’s not a big continuity flaw if he gets a little darker when he’s been outside a while.
Am I the only one who imagines that Commander’s voice sounds like the guy who voices Brock Sampson from the Venture Brothers on Cartoon Network while reading this web comic? Somehow, he’s the only one who has a very distinctive voice in my head. I think he even resembles Brock Sampson in some ways. But the side chops totally make me think of Cutter from Elf Quest (much older Cutter).
No, someone says that every couple strips. It’s also been said to be wrong. Apparently he sounds like Beetlejuice.
My headcanon is that Commander was only ever voiced by Patrick Warburton during the Nomura virus story arc
Beetlejuice?! Wow, I am so not in sync with the makers on that one. Beetlejuice (voiced by Michael Keaton) always made me think of the used car salesman or snake oil salesman, and in a submissive, henchman, whiny man-child voice. Gravely voice aside, it seems so out of place for the cool and always in control Commander. If I was to think of another deep, gravely male voice, I’d go with Michael Clarke Duncan – he has the deep voice but tends to play characters who are self-secure, mellow, and have a soft teddy bear side. I’m so sad about his passing – I’ve seen him in several movies, and I would’ve loved to see him in more roles.
When people ask what his accent is supposed to sound like the stock answer is Beetlejuice, but if you want the specific voice I get in my head when I write him it’s basically this.
HA! You know, I always heard Commander as a Southern Tom Waits ever since I watched “Wristcutters A Love Story.” It just seemed to to fit.
Give Tank a Pei. Call the pei a ironic name. Or even have also the G1 cassette cat Ravage(?), left decepticons because megatron was an idiot, turned into galvatron, was even more idiotic, and even soundwave changed from using cassettes to dvd’s and then the cloud and the recent frame changes…
YES! I think a bad-ass cyborg therapy dog would rock so hard.
Oh god can someone tell me what’s happening in this page because for love nor money i cannot get the damn picture to load. Every other page? Fine. This one? Nope.
My first thought was Rex from Fallout: NV.
….
….
A Cyborgdog? like
I meant to write “Like Rex” and link to his page on the Fallout Wiki but I dunno how to use hotlinks/potholes, apparently.
Boy needs a tibetan mountain dog. Nobody’s gonna think you’re not manly when you’ve got a lion sized fluff-monster for a pet. Plus. They’re a chow breed, making them one of the most stable ‘project car’ breeds in human history. Started as a hunting breed, then got made into a working/cart-pulling breed, then made into guard dogs. Makes them crazy strong, super loyal, and playful with the right folks.