Guest week 2016
May 8, 2016
5:37 pm
In case you don’t follow my twitter, survived the surgery, still up and kickin’
Some of my friends did me a solid and drew up some strips to give me a weekend to recover without worrying about deadlines. I had no idea the amazing and fantastic Nick DeWitt was cooking this one up for me, so I’m going to use it to introduce the one you’ll be getting tomorrow. Surprise double comic week!
Looking forward to the new artist but at the same time gonna miss the old artwork. There can never be another Machismo artist the you, try though they might
I’m just taking a week off…
Nope, completely dead and buried already, photo notwithstanding, sorry, movin’ on…
Pfft, as if a little thing like dying would stop Coelasquid updating…
yep
And on the 7th day, she rises to punch a mountain with her invincible drawing arm. The mountain turned into a new Death Valley, with a river flowing through it to symbolize the Mountains pain tears. The Pain river then flows near towns with a need for water. CoelaSquid prevented the drought of that town with just one punch. Fancy
That’s what you think!
Sometimes I can still hear her voice
They were a good webcomic artist while they lasted. It’s always sad to see them go like this. Is there anyone picked to do a eulogy?
Shhh, Coela, hush.
If you’re dead, you don’t have to pay taxes. Wink, wink.
Nuh-uh! There’s still “Estate Taxes!”
Damn! There really is NO cure for taxes, is there? They even get you on the other side of the grave!
I’d like to say I’m surprised some people just don’t pay attention to what you say, but… :I
Does nobody actually pay attention to what Coela actually says? Jesus fuck.
Enjoy a well deserved break.
Whoa, nasty wound there!
On the bright side, it will turn out as an awesome scar!
Have a quick and easy recovery!
Maybe Coelasquid can incorporate it into a nice Kurgan cosplay.
How are you at singing “New York, New York,” and/or terrorizing nuns, Coela?
Ha! In my mind, the voice of the Kurgon read the whole paragraph. :D
Now she just needs a friend with a long raincoat and a American/French accent…
I think Clancy Brown as a character will fit right in with the rest of the men from the comic. Commander’s Nephew?
And get well Coelasquid.
Only if Mr. Krabs gets a cameo too XD
I wish you happy healing and no relapses. I will happily wait for your return. gnarly scar btw. Not to be awkward or anything but you’re very attractive just saying.
Her hardassitude will crumple your puny comment and use it for a toothpick! Seriously though, go for the stocky chicks with interesting personalities, life becomes seriously awesome.
I wish you a swift recovery! Take your time, take more time if you need! Lots of love and warmth from your fans in Europe!
Also being from Europe I’m gonna second that : )
Also: You know that you are doing us all a favor each week by drawing this right? You don’t owe anybody shit. You can take as much time off as you want and you don’t NEED a reason to do it : )
I’m not from Europe, but I can agree with the second comment. Take the time you need and want, because you can. You owe no one anything. Whatever you decide to do, we’ll be here when you are feeling up to it.
Bst wishes for a fast recovery, and I pray they were able to get something significant done with the surgery. We’re so glad you’re on the mend.
I never realized how badly I wanted Asgore to be in this comic until I saw it but now I want it SO BADLY.
I mean, now there’s a guy who needs the agency’s help reintegrating into society.
yeah and like, he murdered 6 kids that’s gotta be quite a hurdle
In his defence, we don’t know if those 6 kids were on a pacifist run. I mean, if they had been, more monsters would be friendlier to humans…
A lot of them are quite friendly, they just don’t quite get that their particular forms of friendliness hurt humans.
Asgore’s actually one of the monsters LEAST in need of the agency’s help reintegrating into human society, although as the second manliest one after fishlady he is one of the ones best suited to its organizational mandate.
I kind of assume that the other humans let him kill them, given that they didn’t have any reason not to just keep trying until they killed him.
also ordered medical experiments on comatose people without their consent or their families’ consent
In further defence Ashore delegated the task of finding a way out of the barrier to Alphys. Blame her for the comatose experiments.
In FURTHER defence none of the equipment is ever found in Asgores castle its likely they died to Undyne or random monsters as Asgore himself has little interest in actually leaving his castle and hunting souls.
Furthermore who is to say the other humans were children or ‘innocent’. One of then carried an empty but real gun. Another wielded a knife. Could have caused trouble and died in a genocide run or caught unawares.
Congrats on the recovery Coela, hope you are OK with the scar.
Um…no? The “fallen down” monsters were specifically brought to Alphys to see if she could help them. They KNEW the treatments were going to be experimental because no one had ever managed it before as well. She was even going to send them home until the side effects happened.
@Pierre
“ASGORE asked everyone outside the city for monsters that had “fallen down.” Their bodies came in today”
Asgore was the one who went and got the bodies, he clearly knew about the experiments.
Also it’s quite possible it wasn’t Alphys who started the experiments. Entries 1-8 are written in a different style. The notes that are definitely by Alphys are written in all lowercase, the earlier ones are written with normal capitalization. The experiments were probably started by the previous royal scientist – W.D. Gaster.
As for the final point, Undyne says something to the effect of “no one has ever gotten past Asgore” which implies someone has gotten *to* him at one point and he stopped them.
@GrayGriffin
It wasn’t to help them. The point was to see if they could make monster souls persist after death so they could use their power to break the barrier. The plan was to let them die then harvest their souls.
“But extracting a SOUL from a living monster would require incredible power… Besides being impractical, doing so would instantly destroy the SOUL’s host. And, unlike the persistent SOULs of humans… The SOULs of most monsters disappear immediately upon death. If only I could make a monster’s SOUL last…”
Um…what? Once the monsters apparently get better, Alphys says she’s sending them home. The whole point was to see if “falling down” could be reversed. And they weren’t trying to make monster souls persist after death. They were just seeing if determination could be placed into monster souls so that they could substitute for humans to break the barrier.
She actually was trying to make monster souls linger after death, that way they could be collected and they could build up enough soul power over time to break the barrier. She was surprised when she caused the fallen down monsters to get back up and figured it was a failed experiment with a happy side effect and planned to look elsewhere and send everyone home. Then they melted and things went bad.
Been a while since we’ve seen Canadian Guy. What does he do when Commander Badass is off on his survival games and other adventures (aside from trapping beavers with a concertina and a lantern)?
Cool scar!
Huh. I suppose Asgore technically -is- a villain. And a villain in need of rehabilitation at that. So He’d probably fit right in with the rest of the motley crew. Now I want to see a comic involving the old goat at an Antagonist Anonymous meeting; in a pink shirt flowery shirt and a big beard, holding a watering can or a tray of cookies and explaining that he is here for mass-slaughter of children and stealing their souls.
As far as villains go, that is pretty hardcore, for someone in a pink shirt.
Well being a villain isn’t a prerequisite for their services anyway. They just tend to need the most help it seems.
While he did kill those kids, how do you know those kids didn’t kill any monsters?
I know they didn’t have to because he attacked my pacifist-run self. o.o
That’s different, they were on the brink of escape when you showed up. One more soul and everyone was free.
Remember though as Toriel pointed out, he was ultimately a coward hiding in his castle because he didn’t want to. If he truly wanted to do it he could have left as soon as he had one and got the others easily.
Toriel was being pretty “I need you to be the bad guy so I can be the good guy” imo. If it’s so easy to just go on a human killing spree she was just as free to do it.
But she didn’t really want to go to the surface in the first place. She was perfectly happy living underground as evidenced by the endings where she becomes the next ruler.
No, that’s not it. She doesn’t want to go on a rampage no matter how easy it would be. She’s not saying that Asgore SHOULD have done that. Heck, when she appears she straight up says that the entire reason she came out is that she believed nobody should have to kill someone else.
Her entire point was that HE clearly didn’t want to do it either, like she didn’t want to, because if he really had WANTED to go on a rampage it would have been pathetically easy and they both know it – but instead of owning up to it, he kept telling people that yeah, we’re totally killing all humans, guys. That’s what Toriel chews him out for. Being so scared of disappointing everyone that he’d rather live a lie for centuries and keep killing children than admit that he doesn’t want to hurt anyone anymore. Basically, poor Asgore is extremely conflict avoidant.
Notice how the first thing Toriel as Queen does when you beat the game if she’s alive is to instate a policy that humans are friends. Rampaging, she ain’t.
I always point out the fact that she’s just as much to blame via how she pretty much one shots Asgore. If she was so against his policy and found him that much of a coward, she should have done her duty and forced him to step down until he could clear his head
Instead, she ran away
Those two really need to see a marriage counselor
True, id like to see Sans drunk on ketchup and talking to the commander about timeline jumps, butterfly effect and resets (while throwing bad skeleton puns around of course) while the commander is pretty sympathetic to it all and understanding. Then a commander from the future pops in and clocks himself in the face for sleeping with some chick some time in the past which screws something up between Jonsey. Hes on the floor and Sans asks if he’d like to have that reset option now?
heh, Sans the security guard…
ZIIIIIINGGGGG
that was amazing. i was wondering where this strip was going and then shazam! hahaha.
in other news, so glad to hear you got through the operation ok!! sending you my best wishes for recovery (and sorting out the thyroid meds and all that nonsense)
Holy hell. I hadn’t seen a picture of you before. You look badass as /fuck/. I will never doubt your qualifications to write about machismo ever again.
Having read all these strips, why would you doubt in the first place?
Enjoy the Vaca and feel better! This guest strip is pretty good. Funny, good art work, he has the personalities right, very nice guest strip. I call it a win! (Commander ain’t quite big enough, but that’s ok. Neither am I…)
1. Congrats on a successful surgery. 2. Congrats in advance on getting the awesome scar. Neck scars always seemed to be the most awesome type of scar to me, since the neck is such a vulnerable body part.
That scar kicks ass, you kick ass, and your friends kick ass. Heal well and stay cool!
Whoo! Coala’s not dead and now has a badass throat scar!
Huh, I think that’s probably the first picture I’ve seen of you. You look like a badass! Get well soon! Love the comic.
That’s a badass scar, and I’m glad the surgery went well!
I had to post, if only to say you’re a very sexy rule 63 version of Wez. Ya know, the adorable family-friendly crossbow-wielding mohawk psycho from Mad Max 2. ;-) http://cultspark.com/2013/04/16/the-movie-villain-hall-of-fame-wez/
Life gives you lemons, squeeze ’em in its face and kick it in the nuts.
Rock on, mad bitchin’!
Heaven forbid someone should break another wall. Definitely not some man of war with witty commentary. No sirree.
Ouch. I hope they have you hooked up with some decent painkillers.
Props to fellow thyroid area throat scar persons! Mine’s barely visible anymore, but then again, I’ve had it for at least 15 years.
Glad surgery went well! Nice scar, too. Looks better than mine did a week out. Enjoy the vacation and heal the scar to whatever degree you choose!
Ahaha, that photo was taken the day after, the surgery was just on Thursday
The fourth wall.
That’s funny.
Yeah, and why didn’t I see someone else come up with it first, if not myself?
I noticed the joke immediately, but we seem to be the only one commenting on it. Anyway, great joke!
Yeah, and leave it up to the Canucklehead to apologize for it…
;)
Congratulations, and best wishes! We’re pulling for you. Keep your stick on the ice.
Best. I need to start using that saying more.
Anyone else notice the top of Kratos’ sandles are a different color in the the second panel he is drawn in?
The punchline . . . it hits like the Kool-aid man.
OH YEAH!!!!
I’m glad you’re doing well and hope ( haha was going to say “only uphill”… then thought No… “only downhil” … so…) it is only… hill free(?) from here on!
(Why don’t people like hills?!?)
I also love that Asgore is just sitting there chilling. He’s like . . . the least suited person to be working at the agency.
until you remember that he still has murderous tendencies from time to time
You mean the Asgore that tries to kill you on a pacifist run, even after you repeatedly state you don’t want to fight him (it’s an option in ACT) and potentially wave a piece of pie his former queen made around. In fact he even opens up the battle by destroying the MERCY button, preventing you from running or trying to spare him.
He’s big, he’s strong (stronger than Undyne) and strongly believes killing an innocent child is the only way to solve his problems.
Yeah, he belongs here.
I’m pretty sure the primary reason he destroys the Mercy button is because a) he wants to fight so little he’d be spared right off the bat, and b) he doesn’t feel he deserves mercy and that he SHOULD be killed.
Honestly, Asgore fucked up a lot, but it’s hard not to feel for the guy. Being caught in a choice between child murder and dooming your entire kingdom to rotting in hopelessness eternally has to suuuuck.
If he wanted to fight and kill you, he could do it in pretty much one hit. His attack and defense are 80/80. (Just like Toriel, who likewise holds back) None of his attacks will kill you in one hit, though. Every one of them, no matter how low your LV and DEF, will only take you down to 1 HP unless you’re already at 1 HP.
He gives you every opportunity to turn away. He keeps delaying the fight as long as possible. He doesn’t kill you until there is no other way. He destroys the mercy button because he doesn’t feel he deserves any. He can’t look you in the eye as he fights. He regrets EVERYTHING, but as the king sealed under the mountain, is stuck in a position where he can’t back down or escape anymore.
If he wanted to kill you, he would absorb the human souls. If he wanted to kill you, he wouldn’t wait until you were staring him down, needing to kill him to leave. He is a poor, miserable creature.
Hey, you’re still alive! High five!
Oh my fucking god that last panel. I am in tears from laughing so hard!
Spot on with the tone, Guest Artist! And that is indeed a badass neck scar, Coelasquid. Glad to see it went well!
ASGORE!! :D Great seeing you’re still breathing and all that alive stuff, it’d suck majorly if you weren’t, to be frank :x
Awesome news, glad to hear you’re okay!
Plus, on the side, you have extra incentive to make a Kurgan cosplay while the scar is still visible, but you’ll have to hurry cause they tend to get reduced to light colored lines after a few months.
Woohooo! Awesome that you’re out and about AND getting valuable recuperation time. Continue kicking ass at the exact right level to continue recovery.
On the one hand, I’ll miss your work, even if it’s only for a week.
On the other hand, after all you’ve gone through lately, you sure as hell earned a break. Hell, I’m surprised you haven’t taken one sooner or for longer. Hope the week off helps!
Now did He teach Kool-Aid how to do that or was it the other way around?
You look totaly Mad Maxish in that jacket, hair and scar. Step aside Furiosa, there is a new badass in town. Get well soon.
I want that “Hang In There” poster.
Oh my gosh yes. The cat hanging from the flexed bicep. I had to re-look to catch that XD
A tithing for our recovering leader
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RnZQeWIzIOw
Actually I think this one might look better my bad https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=efLYRP_RY50
What even are you. You are to your line of work what Thor is to the avengers. Casually a god. Tho I’m not sure Thor would deal with cancer and bodily breakage as well.
So glad to hear the surgery went well! I can see where Commander Badass got it from…
Well, when I thought you couldn’t look more badass, here you are with a dope-ass scarf in your neck.
Despite it comes from a cancer removal surgery, I think you are one of the few people in this world that fit physically with scars and look even more awesome.
I hope you are doing well, take all the time you need!
I’m very much amused that Asgore is part of the macho men category. *_*
Well, he is the biggest, strongest dude in the game. And he’s the only one you can’t talk down.
You can’t talk down Undyne either, you know. All you can do is run.
!
At the extreme risk of having no originality – Kurgan Kurgan Kurgan Kurgan, The Kurgan! (I just reeeaally had to eliminate that from my system).
How is every comment here not basically that? Considering you casually dress as such so often.
Light bits aside, life sure is a crazy place, but I reckons you got the apprope resilience, CS (and then some).
Sincere survivor’s salute from the other side of a distant monitor.
Keep on crushin on.
Doncha know? You cant kill The Kurgan. Specially in Road Möde!
I’m sure you’ve already heard it, but damn – you’re going to be able to make up some awesome stories to tell people that comment on the scar.
Seriously though, love your work and hope you recover swiftly.
Glad to hear you’re on your way to recovery!
ASGORE! This makes me entirely too happy! Hope to see him in your drawing style sometime C-squid! Really he is one of the sweetest characters just in a really bad position he can’t get out of. Most misunderstood character in the series.
Hope you have a swift recovery.
If you have a place that sells goat’s milk lotion and you use it on the scar once it is healed, it will help soften the skin until it doesn’t look like anything at all. Roomie uses that and it works wonders on scar tissue.
Huh, I did not think it was possible for you to look more badass but I guess wrestling cancer to death will do that. Hope your recovery goes well and have a good bit of a break.
You look even more like a badass now, seriously.
thats good, rest well, dont push yourself too much :)
Horray! I am glad you’re alive and I hope the surgery fixed what needs fixing and the medicine does what it’s supposed to do!
One hell of a battle wound! I hope you’re on the mend quickly and painlessly, but no rush on that. Enjoy some well deserved time off! The people filling in for you are doing a bang up job. :) Peace out, koalasquid! XP
Lookin’ good! Glad you came through the surgery OK and hope you have a complete and speedy recovery.
That portrait of you is almost as awesome as the real picture of you.
thank you for including goat dad and also i personally apologize for every single example of goat-dad discourse this generates
Good on you. That scar should be a lot less noticeable in a month or so, so you’ll only have this cool looking battle-scar look left. Adds to the badass.
Oh hi Asgore. Didn’t know you counted as a Manly ‘Man’, but I guess they never stated Manly ‘Human’, and you definitely fit the body requirements of manliness.
This is hilarious. I don’t know who Nick DeWitt is and don’t have a tumblr to follow him with, but he’s doing you justice, Kelly. Can’t wait to see tomorrow’s, and who it’s from.
You’ve got great friends. Glad to see you survived and have a badass throat scar instead of a horrific one that would frighten small children and oversensitive mothers. Rest well, and don’t hesitate to ask for more help if you need more time! I’m pretty sure your friends are honored to be asked and more than happy to help, no matter what you need. *internet hugs*
I’m gonna be honest right now. When I first saw that picture that Commander is holding, I did not realize it was Coelasquid.
I thought it was a character from Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure. I haven’t read/seen it yet, and the cheekbones kinda threw me. Derp.
Congratulations on not dying and getting a badass neck scar.
Thought the same thing (except about Jojo)
Hang in there.
Get well soon!
Don’t mean to be rude, but is that photo Rocky is holding supposed to be Coala? o_O
Thought he was holding up a missing persons photo or a potential new male cast member or something
I think it’s a great portrait!
Woohoo! You made it! Show your body who’s boss!
Also, I’m diggin’ the kinda-bizarre theology they’ve got going on in this strip.
I am glad you are alive and not dead. I like your art.
Easily one of my favorite 4th wall jokes ever. Thank you for this one.
So glad to hear the surgery went well! :D Hope you recover quickly and without issues.
Also, I NEED THAT HANG IN THERE POSTER. PLEASE MAKE IT AND PUT IT IN SOCIETY6 I WILL BUY IT.
That’s good to hear, Kelly. Take it easy, and hopefully you’ll recover quickly.
Is it insensitive to say that, that looks like it will be one badass scar? Congrats on your surgery, Hopefully your cancer treatment continues to go well!
It’s awesome that you survived surgery. The guest comic is fricken’ awesome. Plus, we get another awesome comic from you this week. Plus all this absolute madness with busted bones and cancer hasn’t killed off your devotion to us, your loyal and devoted fans. What I’m trying to say here is that your level of awesome might kill your fans before life kills you; and I want to thank you for that.
Feel better! Thanks for the guest comic :)
Been a long time lurker of the comic. Just wanted to say that I’m glad the surgery and everything went ok. Hope to see you back here, soon.
Btw, I think the best thing about this random comic is the “Hang in There” poster on the wall.
You’re The Kurgan! Celebrate that scar. Aggravate it so that it heals up even more gnarly than it otherwise would. Then brag to people that you were stabbed in the throat and lived. Let them know that The Gathering is near, and you intend to claim The Prize.
Lady, you look like a total badass.
So it looks like the scar is below the voicebox, but I figure I’ll ask anyways since nobody else has: how’s your voice? Hopefully you can still speak okay. I’m guessing that no news is good news on this part but it’s good to have confirmation.
Yeah, it’s a little sore just because of how it pulls on the muscles and skin and all that when I move my jaw, but otherwise my voice isn’t even huskier than usual or anything.
Looks a like a thyroid surgery scar… Thyroidectomy? Parathyroidectomy? Just professional curiosity, if you don’t want to share I won’t be hurt.
Well, I feel horrible, completely forgot about the thyroid cancer.
Glad to hear that the surgery went good! I wish you a speedy recovery Coelasquid!
Glad to hear the surgery went well and hopefully you get some good luck from here on out! Oh awesome jacket in that pic btw!!
Woo! Guest week, and you have assembled your crew well it seems, because this is a good kickoff :)
I’m glad that the surgery turned out well for you. Best wishes for your recovery.
I can’t think I’ve seen admissions of 4th wall breaking done better than this, thank you, Coelasquid!
Really glad to know that your surgery went well! Take all the time you need to recover and I hope you heal fast!
Gratz on survival! Glad t’ hear you’re doin’ well, and hope your recovery is fast and as comfortable as beer and meds can make it.
Sending prayers and healing happy thoughts! <3 <3 <3
the jojo is strong in you in this guest art
Apropos of absolutely nothing, at least judging by this picture, Coelasquid is probably the scariest (and simultaneously most badass looking) comic artist I’ve ever seen :P
Anyway, best of wishes. Get well soon!
Um… I’m not sure what’s up, but any comic after this returns a 404…
Hey, I just wanted to congratulate you on your badass neck scar. I’ve got a similar one on my neck after a trampoline incident gone wrong (basically broke my neck, but not the spinal column). Not sure how you feel about scars, but mine’s faded a bit. It’s still very visible, but if I applied cream to it (which I don’t want to, personally), it would probably disappear entirely.
Glad to hear you’re doing well.
Aww, now I wanna see more of Asgore in this comic!
I’m glad your reviving I love this comic!!!
Coela, you always look so damn cool. *_*
Glad the surgery went well.
Wow. The artist is an actual road warrior. I’m impressed.
Is that… King Asgore… from Undertale? O.o