I don’t care if everyone in the world has probably done some variation of this joke before, I still get a kick out of it.
And so do we B)
Spartan staring contest is indeed the most intense staring contest.
A little worse than a staring contest.
Just came back from Urban Dictionary… Now i understand…
And wha-hey! I’m SECOND! *socked in the face*
Now I get it…
Aaaaand…That’s why I would be out the door, right alongside the Commander. I don’t wanna know just as much as he don’t wanna to know.
Nay. A Mr. Fish eye staring contest be the ultimate test of one’s soul.
Definitely! Also, you’d be at a terrible disadvantage if both your eyes looked the same direction.
Beware the wall-eyed fish of awesomeness and death-stare.
A Fluttershy staring contest is the ultimate test of your soul. She once beat a cockatrice.
Fuck yeah she did, do not anger Fluttershy if you value your life and sanity.
No the ultimate starring contest would be with itachi uchiha, as soon as you start, you’ll suddenly being tortured by tsukinomi
Manly Guys Doing Manly Men.
Instead of cheesy 70’s disco music, their scowly manlove is set to the Terminator soundtrack.
Ah… I’ll be in my bunk.
THUMP THUMP THUMP THU-THUMP
oh god the laughing, it hurts
oh gosh that is so disturbing. BUT I CAN’T HELP LAUGHING ANYWAY!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Now thinking about it, who would win?
No one the ultimate staring contest would go on for eternity.
Their eyesockets become dessicated holes, in which one could hear the distant shrieking of lost souls…
I don’t believe that the staring is the goal in and of itself. Keep in mind, its not a staring contest, its Gay Chicken. Note if you will, that with each panel, their faces get closer together…
Gay chicken’s final moment is kissing is it not?
No. That’s just the beginning.
Well, gay tendencies were very common in Greek culture.
But not in Spartan culture, any one caught in homosexual acts in sparta would have large pieces of fruit shoved up their rectum.
Uh… you do realize that being gay (or bisexual, since Spartan soldiers were usually married to a woman in order to produce children) was considered a GOOD THING for Spartan warriors? They figured a soldier would be less prone to cowardice if he knew his lover was fighting as well.
The only part where Sparta was different from other Greek city-states was that they didn’t use homosexuality to determine unit formation. Other armies would usually have lovers fight next to each other because they figured they’d fight harder to protect and impress each other, but Spartans used more practical (and probably less distracting) ways to decide who goes where.
Erm.. In Spartan culture homosexuality was extremely encouraged. In fact, when men got married to their wives, the wedding ceremony started off with his bride arriving dressed as a man. Throughout the ceremony she would cast these off to reveal woman’s clothing to represent his change from having sex with men to gaining sex with a wife.
THE MORE YOU KNOOOOOW
May I suggest Plutarch’s On Sparta as a source? Point in fact, Spartans did not encourage homosexuality (between adult Spartiates) and abhorred the idea of ordering ranks by pairing lovers. Lycurgus, the man responsible for the reforms that made Sparta the infamous military powerhouse that it was, believed that ranks should be determined by skill and talent, not relationships. Therefore, of organizing soldiers by paired lovers, Lycurgus was said to have “stamped this thing as foul.’
Furthermore, as far as the ancient Greeks (and specifically Spartans) were concerned, there were two types of homosexual relationships. That of pederasty (between a boy and older man) and that of two adult men. Pederasty, amongst historians and the ancient greeks themselves, appears to have been a controversial issue. When and where it did occur, is usually contained a sexual aspect. However, this was usually intercural, as actual penetration was considered shameful to the boy (usually age 12-20, rarely up to 30). Anal or oral penetration was an act deemed fit for slaves or prostitutes, not aristicratic youths.
In Sparta, the sources argue about the nature of pederasty. In some, it would appear that young Spartan boys and girls were used for intercural sex, in order to instill within them from an early age that their bodies were not their own, but the state’s. However, Plutarch, Xenophon, and Aelian all agree that it was considered “an abomination” equivalent to incest for an adult Spartan sponser to give into carnal temptation and have intercourse of any kind with the boys he was training. Aelian goes further to say that if any male Spartan couple was found to have had sexual relations, they were forced into exile or to commit suicide. It was perfectly normal to find men/boys attractive. But, it may have been a strictly “look, don’t touch” affair. This may have to do with Lycurgus “breeding program” for the Spartans. If a Spartan wasn’t spilling his seed into a woman (could be any woman, as older Spartiates often let younger Spartiates impregnate their wives if she was still fertile but he was not), then he was in a sense stealing from the state. Excessive sexual intercourse was frowned upon in Sparta, as it was seen as harmful to conception.
Adult homosexual relationships were generally frowned upon, across all of greece, and definitely Sparta. Again, this was not because a man found another man attractive, but because the sexual act (or suggestion of it) was disgraceful to at least one of the couple. Pederasty was cool, because naturally an adult man was dominant to a youth. But when that youth grew up, the relationship was expected to end. This is because of the penetration thing. As the greeks saw it, in sex between adult men, there was a “giver” and a “reciever” (passive would be a better translation). The “giver”, whether with a youth or man, was scene as asserting his masculinity. If the “passive” was a youth, that was considered natural. However, if an adult man assumes the “passive” role, they were considered to have “made a woman of themselves”. And in the Greek world, nothing is worse than for a man to be “womanly”. If a woman does something admirable, she is considered to be “manly”. Anyway, the plays of Aristophanes contain many scathing criticisms about such adult passives.
Thus, Leonidas isn’t joking when he says “betray their woman-like nerves”. As greeks, as Spartans, neither of these guys will accept being the passive.
Forgive me for my history rant….I couldn’t make it stop.
That guy! It’s not about being practical! They only emotion a true warrior is allowed to feel is anger and bloodlust! Affection and care are for the weak! I’m looking at YOU Atheneans!
This discussion has been very…
*puts on sunglasses*
…eye-opening for me.
Not only tendencies – it was a full-blown system. Homosexual relations in ancient Greece are (as far as I’ve seen) mentioned in a rather carefree way. However, those relationships were as far as I know between a younger (lower/feminine) and an older guy.
Could it be this gay chicken is to decide who will be the bottom/woman?
Yeah, that was my first thought, actually.
The notion that the greeks were all gay pedophiles (and while we are at it, that egyptians were all into bestiality) is because of some historians making the grave error of looking at some scraps of surviving poetry and using it to paint the entire culture in overly broad strokes.
give archeologists in the year 4000 some gay furry poetry from the year 2000 and they will make similarly ridiculous assumptions about us.
Also, The term “Lesbian” comes from the island “Lesbos” where a femal poet describes the ways the women on the island pleasured eachother. The greeks were probably the first to find homosexuality normal *is currently proud to be a greek*
Well, maybe. Mind you, the longer we go, the more we learn about the past. Our knowledge will increase, and I doubt many historians would believe as such about this millenium in about 2000 years. Though mind you, that may happen with popular history, which does that a lot.
The greeks were probably the first to find homosexuality normal *is currently proud to be a greek*
Not the first apparently.
SO MANY COMMENTS! RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well it would go on forever but one is mortal. Kratos wins.
They’re both too macho to look away, so there would be no winner and no loser as the game never ends. They’d end up in a permanent gay relationship.
Married for thirty years with two adopted girls from China. I think you officially made this strip funnier than I ever could have.
I’d like to see future strips continue to chronicle this competition: the lavish wedding, the purchase of a beachfront bungalow near Notleys Landing… eventually, two elderly bearded men preparing a lovely duck confit with pommes de terre à la sarladaise together, each convinced that at any moment the other’s going to give in.
this needs to happen.
also: press O to hug your family xD and then those two girls grow up to star in street fighter.
Oh, god…please yes…that might just make my life.
Oh god, I laughed so hard at this. Ah, that would be great. XD
It ends in hot, manly manlove.
No it ends with us thinking that the don’t ask don’t tell police is probably instated because of the things said in the overly long, too informative responses that is if any of you actually read them and by the way there all true.
The female fandom wins, that’s who.
o__o this is literally one female who could live without this particular variant of rule 34.
I call Rule 34 on Rule 34!
…and I’m afraid of the outcome of that.
I’m not sure whether I should be glad or disappointed that I wasn’t the first with that idea.
this is Gay chicken.. no, THIS IS MAAAANLLLLLLY!!
Did they die?
Now, I take offense to that.
No respect these days, don’t you agree?
Life is just so difficult for us.
Since when was I coupled with you two losers?
Yeah. . . Have fun with that.
Bets are open. $300 of gummy worms on kratos.
I doubt the worms will be gummy for long.
Well played sir.
I agree well played.
I want the mug !
I heart you Kratos and Leonidas.
Also, I can help but notice the art seems a bit different than usual. Not in a bad way, it just feels like it’s slightly improved.
Probably because I only had to draw three things and copy-paste them a lot.
This can only end in tears.
Gay Chicken: The only winning move is not to play.
Correction: the only winning move is to videotape it and sell to your faghag friends (keeping one copy of course)
Faghag is the correct term, right? Women who will stalk homosexuality among men to witness the gay goodness. I’m never 100% certain on my translations, but you get the point :P
No, a faghag is the girl who if BFF with a gay guy. It also works the other way around with a guy being BFF with a lesbian.
What you’re thinking of is a hentai fangirl. Those smell like old meat and write Link fanfics.
I think for them to be a fag hag they have to actively seek out friendships predominantly with gay guys. It’s not just “best friend is gay” it’s “only best friends because he’s gay.”
Isn’t the term “fujoshi”?
Did I hear someone say weeaboo?
You’re showing your ignorance, kid.
You’re so kneejerk it’s like you don’t even realize you’re tro-
Ahahaha. I see what you’re doing there.
They’re getting closer
They’re going to kiss
there doing it man
there MAKING THIS
Everyone involved wins Spicynoodle. Everyone. Especially the yaoi fangirls.
Leonidus would definitely win.
He was Spartan. This is what they do.
They’re both Spartans.
But, Kratos a Spartan, too.
THEY ARE SPAAAAARRTANS!
They are Spartans. But Kratos has sex with more women.
And according to the rules of high school and the internet, that makes him less gay.
Even though he runs around in nothing but boots and underwear, but whatever. Them’s the rules.
leonidas banged carmen electra…
that’s gotta count for something on the gay-o-meter
I don’t think Spartans need an excuse to get gay with eachother
$10.00 says it ends in them making out.
If only homoerotic subtext could be harnessed as an energy source …
They’re both Greeks.
…I’m just saying.
Huh… I waited for Leonidas appearance in comic. And I knew he MUST have a fight with Kratos. Just doesn’t thinking about that this way :D
Wait, I’m confused, are they actually playing gay chicken, or is it just a staring contest? If it is the former I wanna watch owo
It’s how angry, scowly men play gay chicken.
This just made me imagine them still staring angrily at each other as they make out.
Really not trying to gnit-pick here but… if we put both in the same storyline, shouldn’t Leonidas be worshipping Kratos?
Also, yes I do find this hilarious… I just comment oddly.
I’m pretty sure Leonidas was like, “Fuck the Gods!” and went to war without their approval. And even still, Kratos was like “Fuck the Gods” and went around killing them. Either way, neither is the “worshiping” type and technically neither should be alive in moderately modern time. Yet no matter how much you argue, spongebob will have campfires and songs named after them.
Nah, Leonidas was “Fuck the Government”, not “Fuck the Gods”
Leonidas WAS the government; or at least the heriditary head of it.
Underwater you must remember that.
Four of ’em.
Ha. I know how it ends. Kiss kiss kiss
Hack slash chop.
Circle Square Triangle?
No talkin’ dirty!
Barsukthom, from LJ? :D
I love the plus-sized doors to accomodate the extra-manly shoulders of this gang. Did they build new, or just put up sheetrock in an old airship hangar?
The best part is reading the speech in angry, man-shouty voices.
…My day. It has been made.
I just want to say kudos to you for not making a “THIS. IS….” joke.
On the other hand, the Commander might’ve gotten sick of it already and put a ban on shouting the words “THIS. IS.”
That would be an interesting fight: Leonidas, slayer of “immortals” and half the Persian army vs. Kratos, slayer of Gods and anything that’s in his way.
Yeah, Kratos survived to the end, but ‘A god-king must fall’
Immortals actually were the shittiest of the shitty troops Persia had. They were called Immortals because there were so god damn many of them that it seemed like they never died, since as soon as you killed one another was right there.
So slaying Immortals isn’t really that impressive.
You don’t know anything about the Achaemenid Persian empire, do you?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cx8G7BlzBZI I believe this was, if not the first, than at least one of the first instances of it.
No way, I knew guys who played it in bars way before that episode.
If you discard this card, you may cast it instead of putting it into your graveyard? THIS… IS… SPARTA!!!!
(Not sure anyone will get this, but hey.)
Magic the Gathering, my friend my friend.
I’ve had friends that play gay chicken. That is one hell of an awkward game. I no longer hang out with those guys.
Yeah, gay chicken is nothing like that. It’s truly bizarre to watch, even for the shortest period of time. In the barracks, we had a couple of guys who would go really, really, really far. Somehow, people still played gay chicken with them.
That’s what I think of repealing don’t ask, don’t tell.
This is weird… Playing chicken is kinda how me and my boyfriend first kissed, but… it wasn’t gay because I’m a girl… But yeah, amusing nonetheless.
No, it was still gay, you just didn’t know it at the time.
and since these guys are both Greek it means they are both at max 5 foot 2 bahahaha!
I think the GoW designers said by scale Kratos is supposed to be like 8 or 9 feet tall. Not that it matters when the characters he’s always interacting with are the size of mountain ranges.
I love how their faces are closer and closer in each panel. XD
That’s how you play gay chicken.
*waits for manly puckering of both the Spartan males lips*
Gotta love the similarities between ’em! Scar on the eye, chin whiskers, intense scowl…
I’m having to agree with the Commander on this one, don’t wanna see it go any further.
“BLOOD AND THUNDER!”
“VICTORY AT SEA!”
Oh my no.
“I AM A RIVER TO MY PEOPLE!”
cease your gibbering.
And the child sired by that wizard was me.
“SHOW ME YOUR HONOR!”
“NO. YOUR OTHER HONOR.”
“MY HONOR DEMANDS IT.”
AFIX THE BOW OF SHAME!
Keep it in the scabbard…
you just made me laugh harder than the comic ever could XD
…not that the comic itself is anything less than mo’fucking AWESOME.
The thing is… Spartans would sleep with each other as a form of bonding. I think a little game of gay chicken might end in a tie…
A really manly tie
No one, I repeat, NO ONE has made this obligatory comment:
“This is blasphemy! THIS IS MADNESS!”
I don’t think anyone really wants to see this joke completed anyway.
-in a sarcastic voice- “Go-ahead, make my day.”
THIS… IS NOT… CAKE!!!
Rather than /betraying/ their “weak, woman-like nerves” wouldn’t the loser actually be giving into them? P:
This is the “unintentionally reveals” definition of “betrays.”
Later he had to wash the table.
THAT is what INTERNS are for.
Like every one of your comics, this is just made up of pure awesome.
i read the comic and chuckled, then i read “it ends in triumph” and busted out laughing
So this is why Kratos is in Mortal Kombat 9?
Is it just me or the face in the Commader’s mug is the new Splatterhouse logo?
A Splatterhouse coffee mug. Classy.
This intense stare-down ends with a kiss.
Well, we all know Spartans love little boys…
Haha, this is hilarious xD
So, I’m assuming that since this is their version of gay chicken, it won’t actually end up in kissing just because their definition of the gayest one is the one that looks away, therefore being much more womanly than the one that continues staring. That being said, weren’t a lot of spartans gay?
No, it works like regular gay chicken. They just frown more while they go about it.
It was not that a lot of Spartans were gay, it was just that they were ONLY around men for years on end.
Long-time lurker and, now, first-time commenter.
My weak woman-like nerves are very happy with this comic and the unseen outcome it promises between my two favorite Spartans.
In the name of the wee man I love all of these comics. And I just want to say: Well done, Coela and keep up the good work :)
I’m kind of ashamed about this, but I saw 300 before I played God Of War, so that’s why it’s in this order…
Ever since I played God Of War, I’ve wanted to see a Leonidas/Kratos matchup. Although… Based on the stuff Kratos has done, Leonidas doesn’t stand a chance.
It’s true. At the Battle of Thermopylae, Leonidas I dismissed almost all of his troops in the knowledge that they would soon be outflanked and massacred; Kratos would’ve dismissed every last one of them, because he wouldn’t have wanted the other Greek soldiers to steal his orbs.
Friggin’ orb thieves.
No, he would have had them join the other side so he could kill them too.
Oh Leonidas, I don’t think your badass wife will be very pleased about you going on about things being “weak and womanly.” Expect to be banished to the couch and/or stabbed with a dagger.
She must defend her honor, after all.
Or he must surrender his. The other one.
At first, I thought Kratos yelling “GAY CHICKEN” was just a tactic to force Leonidas to break the staring contest. The actual reality of this situation is much more hilarious. And mildly uncomfortable to contemplate.
Same thing happened to me. Except my realization was followed immediately by the desire to egg 2 of my friends into doing it.
HAHAHA!! You too?
I didn’t get it until I’d read partway through the comments.
Whoa, that was my response too.
I haven’t seen 300 and can’t say much about Leonidas, but I can say this for Kratos as of Ghost of Sparta:
Any man who can please 8 women at once is by no means gay. Bi maybe, but not gay.
I don’t think you understand what Gay Chicken is…
*face pal-* Or right, facebook copyrighted “face”… *hmmm*
Relly, they copyrighted the word “face”.
Well in reply to that startling news all I have to say is
“Face the Facts Facebook Fuckers, my Financial Futility Forgot to Finance your Frequently Futile Fabled Facetiously Fabulous Fictitious Fucking Faggot Faces!”
I know a lot more words that begin with “F” but I don’t Feel like using them.
I am truly sorry if I offended anyone not in the facebook stock-market.
Hey, you didn’t misuse any apostrophes, so we’re cool.
It would be funny if in the next two-three panels, Jared walks in with a new xbox and says “FINALLY!” and then it gets destroyed by kratos for interupting the contest.
Oh the wonderful contradiction that would come from this being interrupted by sexy women.
Leonidas’s scar is over his right eye isn’t it?
I love this comic btw. Keep up the good work.
Not in the movie it wasn’t….
That’s so freaky Coelasquid, I JUST made this my laptop wallpaper just a day or two before this came out:
So THAT’S how “triumph” looks like! :D
This is so so sad, but I didn’t realize that they were both shirtless until I saw that. I am so slow…
Not how I play gay chicken…
I love the Splatter House mug (it looks like a splatter house mug anyway. . .) I want one.
Aw man, Manly guys doing Manly guys in the end. :c
WHY DID YOU POST THAT
It had to be said. -nods-
For a minute there I thought the other guy was Canadian Guy…oh well better go and check my glasses XD. Nic ework as always!
I stopped playing gay chicken after the one time when neither of us would look away, and we ended up accidentally kissing..
I don’t care if I’m a chicken anymore, I would really not let that happen ever again.
I had to go check on the meaning of “Gay Chicken”, because for a moment there I thought Kratos was insulting Leonidas with the craziest insult I’ve ever heard, haha
I thought the exact same thing. Like a tactic to make Leonidas lose the staring contest. But then I read everyone else’s comments and googled the phrase. The punchline made a lot more sense afterward.
I am assuming thats a Terror Mask mug (from Splatterhouse) You should put Rick in a strip, that would be a rad thing to do.
If you read this the manga way like I accidentally did at first, it makes it seem like Commander comes back to watch. Seriously, go look! xD
But yeah I don’t wanna know how it ends. I would however want a conclusion to the Commander/Canadian guy fight to the death. I think Commander would win.
HAHA, it’s still funny either way around!
I… I can’t believe someone made a Oglaf reference…
I can’t believe how many other people got it and responded in kind. Clearly, like minds hang out together.
The gutter is wide and deep., with space for many.
This gutter…it is a river.
We are the whores of the internet here.
Naaah. Whores get PAID. We read it for free…
“And in those darkest introspective moments you will despise yourselves, because you know with a certainty that you ENJOY your work. I offer no solace. There is no redemption. We… all of us. We are the damned.
So… lets go have some fun!”
I had no idea what gay chicken was (I don’t get out much anymore . . .) I thought it was just Kratos calling Leonidas gay. Thank you comments for clearing that little mess up. Rereading it made me laugh and the comments made me laugh harder.
Thanks Coela for continuing to make such funny comics!
Btw, I so totally want a Splatterhouse mug XD
Come to think of it…why do all of these people hang around the office. I mean here they are, playing Gay Chicken and Charades in the lounge or whatnot…and isn’t this building a temp agency!?
Has the Commander ever been given reason to kick them out?
I’ll be honest, the comic I was planning on doing if I won the escapist thing is very different from the comic I decided I wanted to do when I chose to do just it for myself.
Care to elucidate? I’m curious.
Less original character development more unfaltering adherence to the original premise. Basically, if I was getting paid to do this I’d keep it bland and safe, but since it’s mine I’m gonna do what I want.
I always figured, along with being a temp agency it also involved therapy. Therapy in becoming a little less manly so people don’t automatically die when they walk out the door. Therapy so they can go to the grocery store without screaming about the eggs. Just plain therapy over all.
WHY DO THEY NOT KEEP THE EGGS NEXT TO THE BACON!?!?!
I WANT MY CORRECT CHANGE CLERK WOMAN!
WAIT IN LINE!? ONLY THE WEAK AND FRAIL RECIEVES NUMBERS SUCH
Is for the best, I do believe.
Oh so it’s a good thing you didn’t win after all. Everyone has more fun in the end.
It’s a good thing I didn’t win because I got a real job that pays a grown up salary immediately after the contest ended.
Except whoever loses at Gay Chicken.
They’re both greeks, chances are even the loser will enjoy it.
The manliness of Spartans is so pure that two Spartan guys making out is not considered gay. EVERYTHING ELSE is the world is considered gay.
– Let’s start ‘Spartan Facts’
Ummm. The only acurate thing in that d*mn movie was that the Spartans fought the Persians? Does that count as a ‘Spartan Fact’?
The movie was pretty accurate to the comic book. If you’re looking to Frank Miller for your grounded historical documentaries, you’re doing it wrong.
Le Sigh. I read two pages of the comic and knew it was… Easy with the facts.
I just wish he’d tried harder. (history nerd)
It wasn’t supposed to be, treating it as anything other than a work piece of fiction loosely inspired by real events means you’re reading into it too much. Saying people aren’t allowed to write historical fantasty because it’s not the way it happened is like saying people shouldn’t be allowed to make horror movies about giant bugs because exoskeletons and insect respiratory ststems can’t realistically support bodies that size. If you’re worried about people misinterpreting what they put in movies as fact, I’d say blatanly over-the-top fantasies that are obviously removed from reality are LESS damaging than something that could pass as a serious account of what happened.
Even WITHIN the story it was a fantasty, it was one surviving soldier coming back to weave this tale for the rest of the Spartans to drum up national unity and support for the continuing war effort.
Basically, I feel like if you’re going to complain that 300 wasn’t a cut and dry History channel documentary, you may as well be complaining that The Lion King had talking animals.
Not to mention that up until very recently and most certainly including the Spartan times, it was considered bad history if you didn’t embellish and make the events mythical on your own to a certain extent.
Also something that is such total and pure eye candy entertainment as 300 has always had a place in societal media. So does accurate depiction and we can love them both. Just saying.
The Lion King had talking animals?! But animals can’t talk D:<
Spartans didn’t have tooth brushes. Ick!
I’ve actually seen a gay guy lose this game.
Not sure what that says about him..
It says that the other guy had a foul breath?
Well they’re both spartans so…..neither of them should be particularly afraid of gay sex.
Unless the thing they’re supposed to chicken out of is it being all tender and girly, and thats what gives them the heebie jeebies.
……I can’t believe this is how they choose to spend their lunch break.
Heaven forbid they eat.
If they spend all their lunch breaks doing stuff like this, they’ll never have time to eat, they’ll waste away and not have the biceps to qualify for this agency anymore D= D= D=
/ignoring the existance of breakfast and dinner
Then again, they won’t be able to punch Average Joes through brick walls or go on mass killing sprees either…
i know this is a necropost and all, but they would just absorb all the protein and hydration they needed from the blood of their enemies that fills the air.
Me and my friends discussed Gay Chicken years ago. We decided not to go with it, because nobody would have been willing to turn away, and that means we all lose. Damn our manly pride.
Here, it would never even start.
I had buddies in the Percussion section of our high school band that played this, but they didn’t bring their faces together. Instead, they sat cross legged from one another, with hands on each others’ knees. They then had to run their hands up their opponent’s thighs and whoever pulled away first was the loser.
One guy won by giving his opponents legs a quick squeeze and freaked the other dude out.
Oh dear. I understand why he doesn’t want to find out now. I must say that I myself, however, am quite curious about the outcome of this challenge. I nearly missed the fact that Kratos and Leonidas move closer in the last panel. From this fact I think we may infer that they are probably “hardcore” players.
Also, a definition for those who don’t know what the game is:
Define: Gay Chicken
After reading this comic and all of the comments I have realized something… I am home!!!! Gay Chick, awesome manly refrences, and Oglaf quotes?! I need to reformat my actual life to fit these parameters! Off to find some manly men!
I never heard of gay chicken before now… I learned something! This makes being up at five worth it after all! :3
There’s something about Kratos screaming GAY CHICKEN that gets me right here
You are aware in Spartan culture that gay relationships were not only considered normal, you were considered a ‘deviant’ if you WEREN’T gay for your fellow Spartans.
Even if they started fighting over who would win, I can picture their eyeballs just..staring at one another….forever staring and never blinking..AN ENDLESSS TORTURE
The gay kissing in lesser in comparison in your mind, isn’t it?
So I approve of this strip, since I’m gay and enjoy man on man action. I just wish I had friends to play Gay Chicken with.
But it doesn’t matter, this strip fulfilled my life long fantasies that nothing can exceed its hot, awesomeness that I just peed my seat in total lust.
…If you’re gay and you play Gay Chicken, then I must call you a cheater, Mr. Cheater!
Damn those cheaters. Of course two men playing Gay Chicken is just for them a fun time. Two women playing Gay Chicken is a fun time for everyone in attendance.
And to think I would be able to escape double standards on the internet? How silly of me.
Also how is being gay, playing gay chicken with ‘friends’ cheating? I didn’t say they had to be guy friends. They could be lesbian friends.
I dunno if that’s gay chicken… I feel like it would have another more different name. You know… since the game is “act gay until you chicken out”
Straight chicken or something. FRIENDSHIP CHICKEN!
But it’s gays. Playing chicken.
It should still be called Gay Chicken :[
The only way gay people could play gay chicken is if there was no attraction between the two. It certainly is possible. Just like a straight man and woman can play it. If there’s an attraction between the two it’s called making out.
Then it’s just regular makeout chicken, I think. It’s probably less of a big deal to kiss someone you aren’t into than someone you aren’t into outside of your sexual orientation.
Then just “sexual chicken with partner I don’t prefer”? It’s a bit too long, no?
I can’t believe I need to elucidate on this. It’s just like Nick and Coelasquid said. If you are gay and playing with a straight friend, then you have the natural advantage and are therefore a cheater. And if you’re playing with another gay guy whom you have no attraction to, then it’s just makeout chicken.
You’re all making it sound as if being gay means you *want to* make out with the person, as long as they are of the same sex. As if we don’t have standards.
Looking back at my dating history, I don’t have standards, and I’m straight.
Yeah, but there’s the threshold factor involved. Say you’ve never french kissed anyone before and now you’re in a game where the first person to turn away before reaching that point is the loser and your opponent has french kissed before (not casually, but still). I’d say the one for whom is his/her very first time would have the natural disadvantage.
Aaaah, Coela you genius you. Although the Gay Chicken I’m thinking of is played a little differently >>;
omfg is all i got to say
That is how you win gay chicken.
Sir, that was made of pure win.
hey, i stumbled to this link, and i recognize your style but it didn’t have your name on in, so i was gonna ask you if this was yours, but then i noticed your name in the link when i pasted it to here, so yeah….anyways, u just wanted to thank you for this guide, because it’s really helping me. Thanks!
THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE!
I WACHED U CULUR THIS TEEHEEHEE
And we all know how it will end. ;D
hm… that’s hot… and I suppose I’m the only one who has ever reached orgasm in this “game” ;)
I just recently found and read these. And reread them. Then show friends. Then reread. Adn it keeps getting better xD
This reminds me of the scrubs episode where Dr Cox and Ben play this
After reading this I decided to play “straight” chicken with my girlfriend…. Coelasquid..I love you, and this time I mean it!
*read above comments* It’s really astounding the lengths some people will go to for “acceptable” homosexuality. Christ man, if you want to make out just do it already and cut the bro excuses.
(Awesome as usual by the way)
Off topic Coelasquid is “Red” from FF IX Manly? In comparison to the guys in the comic.
Never played it.
Only Cid and Barret from FFVII are manly. One is based off Dennis Leary, but making a space ship to blast into space just because he wants to, and the other is Mr T with a cybernetic implant.
Yeah, I know the FFVII guys, it’s probably the only one in the series I can name most of the characters in. Because I too was once a teenage girl.
I dont remember Red, and i’ve been playin through FFIX.
But what i want to know, have you seen the anime Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann, if so how does Kamina/Simon rank compared to the characters in the comic?
Gurren Lagann isn’t really my thing. I’ve tried watching it a couple times, but I’ve never really gotten into it. Honestly, most action comedy anime kind of irritates me.
No Bebop then? :(
Fair enough, not everyones thing. Never hurts to try though. Guessing that means no dragon ball Z jokes either?
But i do want to say, i love your comic, and the fact you make sure to respond to comments like this gives me nothing but the uttmost respect for you.
I think Alasador is talking about Amarant (who, in my mind, definitely qualifies).
End: they kiss by accident, and all Hell breaks loose.
Or would it be “…all Hades breaks loose”?
But hasn’t Kratos killed Hades already?
I was thinking “Hades” as referring to the deity’s domain.
Except Hades was a god, not the domain.
Hades was both the god and the domain.
No Hades was the god. The Underworld was the place
The underworld was referred to as the “Realm of Hades”, the rivers that ran through it were the “Rivers of Hades” all named named after the ruler. Most people refer to the kingdom as “Hades” for short. It’s the title they had for their underworld, it’s like saying “No! That’s not Kitche Manitou! He’s called the Great Spirit!” or “No! That’s not Kleenex! It’s called Tissue paper!”
Seeing as how the Spartans were a pederastic society I cannot see our friend on the right having any trouble with just a little tongue
(They are both Spartans)
Oh joy, evenly matched lol.
Hmm. Where I come from, Gay Chicken involves increasingly more homosexual actions that approach acting completely homosexual without actually being homosexual. The person who turns away first loses, but generally isn’t considered the more homosexual of the two.
As a rule, actually being homosexual disqualifies you. Since that’s just not fair.
Hot Hate-on-hate Make-out Session?
In regards to the Final Fantasy IX discussion, “Red” is the nickname for Amarant Coral. Amarant is incredibly manly and would be right at home in these comics. :) I’d be so happy if any Final Fantasy characters ended up in here, although I know that there’s not many manly ones to choose from.
Luckily, my other great passion is God of War, so finding this website has made me truely happy. I love all your stuff featuring Kratos, although I think my fave has to be the “Kratos Issues” mini comic.
:) I can’t wait to see how Gay Chicken ends.
…Am I the only one who sees the Terror Mask from Splatterhouse on the Commanders mug there?
Judging by the dozen or so people who have already commented on it, probably not….
So, does the Commander’s rehabilitation take in movie characters now?
And comic characters. Honestly I’m more of a movie person than a game person.
Euriproktoi, euriproktoi everywhere!
I don’t know what that means.
My only issue with this comic is ‘the weak woman-like nerves bit’. I mean, did you SEE Leonidas’ wife? She was a badass lady. And she would pummel him in the face for that comment.
And here I was, honestly thinking this “temp agency” was solely for video game characters and Canadians.
You aren’t very observant then. There was Marv from Sin City a while back.
And Frankencastle and the Russian.
I laughed. So hard.
Honestly? I’m more interested in how this started, did they run out of other things to chalenge each other to? Then one of them thought: “wait a second……”
I like to see it as their weekly “No I am better than you” contest.
I just noticed that they’re slowly inching closer to each other,,,,, 0_o
anyone notice how in every panel they get closer together?
That’s how Gay Chicken works.
Coela, no fair. Neither one of them will win and life will implode, causing an end of all manliness and the creation of a new era of manliness that involves fluffy bunnies and bowls of nails for breakfast without any milk.
I think that this is one of my favourite comic pages here on Manly guys doing manly things :)
Also I’m not sure if you’ve played World of Warcraft for a while, but you really should add Varian Wrynn and Saurfang :) Both really fit into the category of manly men :)
Varian Wrynn has both his fans and haters, he has a very rich lore background, but that was never really revealed into the game. Players often just see him lose it during a battle against the enemie, so he sadly also has a lot of people that dislike him (completely forgetting that it was his vote after the second war to spare the orcs that saved the Horde in the first place, even after losing both his father to the Horde previously)
Seeing him get some love into your comic would be great :) I don’t know if you take requests, but I thought I’d ask anyway :) Here is a page about Varian Wrynn: http://www.wowwiki.com/Varian_Wrynn And here is one about Saurfang: http://www.wowwiki.com/Varok_Saurfang
Maybe a picture of both of them being BFF’s? :) People often make theats about who is better, but I would prefer to see them as buddies :)
I wish people would leave WOW out of it. I mean out of life.
Haters gonna hate there… Although, even though I play it myself, to a degree, I find myself agreeing with you there, Anton. Please, for the love of all that’s manly, leave WoW out of this webcomic.
All my friends left me for an MMORPG, I need a hug! *sob*
Next most marvelous thing on this page (after the comic) is SirRehead’s post about Sparta and Homosexuality.
It was a very good post. I think most of the comments are getting Leonidas and Kratos confused with Thebans instead.
How appropriate that this is my first strip to make it to 300 comments.
I feel the need to shout something.
Indeed. Sparta very much abhorred Thebes and its Sacred Band, after all. In fact, Phillip of Macedon criticized the Spartans for believing them to be lesser warriors for fighting as paired lovers. But hey, the Spartans were pretty sore about having their asses handed to them by a former ally/”vassal” from the Peloponessian War…no pun intended.
You are a good person.
I think it’s very odd we haven’t seen a single armwrestling contest yet. Just the thought of commander biceps ripping through his jacket while Canadian guy cries as his arm snaps or something less violent.
There is nothing more manly than gay men. See video.
Erm, I just realized how bad that sounds. It’s a stand up comedian’s skit on Youtube.
Oh god, I thought the Gay Chicken comment was just an insult, then I realized it was the name of the game. Then I looked it up. I’ll take one gallon of bleach to go.
ohh i’ve been educated once again. i too tought it was just an insult until i looked it up. the more you know….the more you laugh.
Uh. But they’re both from time periods/cultures were homosexuality was a common practice;;
My two friends played gay chicken once. Neither of them like to lose. They ended up kissing. I was quite disappointed that i missed it.
I love how you change the title of this one every so often.
Coelasquid should be careful. The last guy to get a kick out of a staring contest with a Spartan fell down a deep, dark hole!
But then what if they look away not because they lost their nerve, but because they just lost interest?
*sigh* That is not the proper way to play gay chicken
“Proper”? THIS… IS… SPARTA!!!
I don’t know if anyone’s posted this yet but ancient Greeks actually thought gay men were superior to hetero men because they thought of women as being imperfect and two men being together to them was the only way to have a perfect relation ship an example of this is how the God of the South wind and Dionysus the god of wine both fell in love with the same man in one of the Greek myths
JUST KISS ALREADY!
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